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It saved me. Thank you Ms. Beattie.
am 20. April 2012
A coworker recommended this book to me, after witnessing my turmoil of constantly being taken advantage of professoinally and personally. She said, it opened her eyes.
With doubts, I bought this book. I had just a little bit too much from everyone. I wanted to stop feeling like a victim. I did not understand why people think of me as a bitch, even after I did so much for just everybody and none for myself.
This book, saved me.
While devoting a significant portion to discussing substance codependence and dysfunctional relationships (between lovers, friends, families and any human beings), it showed me the most important lesson that I learned: be true to yourself. If there is something you do not like, say no. Do not say yes because you expect a certain behavior from the other person. What he/she does, is irrelevant. What is it that you want to do? And more importantly, what is it, that you do not want to do?
Recognize that, and learn to respond to it.
I do not have anyone in my life who is dependent on alcohol or any substance. But I have experienced the same disappointment when someone you love fails to act responsibly. I used to be angry, sad, depressed and still feel them for many different reasons. Feelings are fine. I have learned, after reading this book, how to react to my feelings.
I don't know whether I would have understood this book 10 years ago. But I do now. If you feel the pain I used to feel (and sometimes still do, because it is a long way to recovery), please read this book. Please feel better and say no to people who take advantage of you. Please love yourself enough to be codependent no more.