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Your Many Faces: The First Step to Being Loved (Englisch) Taschenbuch – 6. Oktober 2009

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"Satir is far more than an author in this remarkable book: she's a tour guide, an analyst, a companion, an adventurer, and a coach. Her roles are as diverse as our 'faces'—but all of them help us see our own uniqueness and potential."—Arthur M. Bodin, PhD, Senior Research Fellow at the Mental Research Institute  "In this groundbreaking work, Satir demonstrates her creative genius by turning a complex psychological concept into a simple, powerfully practical metaphor for personal growth and integration."—John Banmen, RMFT, Director of Training at the Satir Institute of the Pacific and coauthor of The Satir Model: Family Therapy and Beyond

Leseprobe. Abdruck erfolgt mit freundlicher Genehmigung der Rechteinhaber. Alle Rechte vorbehalten.

Introduction Dealing with Negative Expectations and Taking the Risk to Look Inside  If you were taught similar things to me, you probably grew up believing that the world was simply divided into good and bad and right and wrong. And if you were to lift the cover on yourself, chances were good that you would have the horrible shock of seeing all the bad and wrong things glaring up at you in a worse state than you had ever imagined. That is the naked truth many expect. Some people think if they lift the cover, there will be all kinds of things reaching out demanding immediate satisfaction, thereby making them feel suffocated, torn, and overburdened. The things I should have done but didn't, ought to do but can't. Some people think that when they lift the cover, it is going to be full of holes, dark recesses that will suck them into the abyss of the beyond and they will be lost forever. I've even heard some people say they were afraid they'd find skills or abilities that they would never be able to fulfill. But some people don't want to lift the cover because "what they don't know doesn't hurt them," and besides, "they are fine the way they are." Some people don't lift the cover because they don't know there is a cover and don't know there is anything to them except what they see or hear or what other people tell them. Described this way, it seems a little absurd, and yet these are frequent responses to lifting the cover and discovering the unknown about oneself. All the secrets, yearnings, and fears of one's inner self often feel like a Pandora's box, which, once opened, may contaminate the universe, or certainly obliterate the owner. In addition to these possibilities, there are some yet unknown ones, some undeveloped buds, like mushrooms growing in the dark, that hold new possibilities. Once the barriers of negative expectation have been dealt with and we decide to take the risk to look, we can make some amazing discoveries. We will begin our experience together by visiting the Theater of the Inside, where in the first act we will observe and get to know some of our parts and the ways in which they behave. In the second act, we will learn ways to deal with and use our parts, or faces, to discover new possibilities for ourselves. After the theater we will meet some famous faces from history, politics, entertainment, and sports in order to compare and learn from their faces, the ones that they presented to the world and, as a result, determined how they are remembered in history. In an amusement park, we will visit a merry-go-round to look at our own faces from a different perspective. Finally, we will observe the delightful balance of a mobile to learn about freedom and equilibrium in motion. All these experiences will help us discover new possibilities for ourselves.   The Theater of the Inside
Act I Lifting the Cover  Use your imagination and come with me to a very private place, deep within yourself, where each of us lives but few of us reveal what it's like to be there. It is our Theater of the Inside, which plays constantly, around the clock. You never know what is playing until you get there—tragedy, comedy, documentary, a morality play, or a romantic love story. It might even be your own production of Little Orphan Annie, or quite possibly, the "Old Woman in the Shoe." Let's go into your mind, which houses this theater. I'll join you. As we step inside, we are handed the program for tonight.  The Theater of the Inside boldly presents tonight's play Your Many Faces rated G Act I          Lifting the Cover Intermission Act II        Who Is in Charge? Your Many Faces are the players,  Everyone Welcome Male and Female Young and Old Admission: Your attention and willing consideration of new possibilities  Cast of Charactersin order of appearance  The Voice of the Outside—The "They" of Society Anger Intelligence Love Stupidity Power and Manipulation Helplessness Courage Jealousy Humor Sex (and their many relatives or variations, too numerous to mention) The Owner New Possibilities  The theater is a giant circular space. We look up to see a domelike structure high above us. Probably this is where the spotlight will be. The stage is directly beneath the dome. As we enter, there is only enough light to see more than just the bare outline of things. The light grows gradually brighter, and we begin to make out a series of doors all around the back of the stage that might be dressing rooms, but right now there are no names on the doors. Although the stage is totally quiet, we begin to notice other things. To our right is a huge contraption that looks like a lighted football scoreboard with a giant thermometer. It has numbers that start with 0 and go up to 100 in bold, black type. There is a column extending upward filled with a luminescent blue-green fluid. Sticking out from one side of the thermometer gadget are two large spotlight-looking objects: midway up is a red light, and at the top, a gold one. Neither is lighted. Under the gold light is a list of words headed "Energy Providers": Hopefulness, Helpfulness, Powerfulness, New Possibilities, Change, and Choice. Under the red light is another list of words, headed "Energy Depleters": Hopelessness, Helplessness, Powerlessness, No Possibilities, No Change, and No Choice. Obviously, there must be a connection between the energy providers (the gold light) and the energy depleters (the red light). Above, in the boldest letters of all, are the words "Energy, Your Source of Life." Apparently, this thermometer registers feelings. It makes me think that our feelings must be capable of both providing and depleting energy. The gold and red lights are probably signals to indicate which is doing what. That seems important. Does it mean there is a way we can experience things differently? Does it mean if we know more about our feelings, we can change some very fundamental things about our lives? Could it possibly mean that we really aren't stuck with the way things are right now? That is a very hopeful and encouraging thought.  Energy, Your Source of LifeEnergy Providers Hopefulness  Helpfulness  Powerfulness New Possibilities Change Choice  Energy Depleters  Hopelessness Helplessness Powerlessness No Possibilities No Change No Choice  On the other side of the stage, to our left, my attention is drawn to another device, equally as large as the thermometer gadget and directly across from it. It has rings of color—nine to be exact—and over the top are the words "Universal Resource Wheel." It too is unlighted, but it is covered with dust and cobwebs as though it hasn't been used for a long time. Somehow I know this wheel holds another of the keys for hope. My eyes move to the right of the wheel and my stomach tightens into a painful knot as I read a list called "Rules for Being a Good Person." There are no cobwebs or dust on this one. It is brightly lighted and looks to be in daily use. It reads, "I must always be right, clean, bright, sane, good, obedient, healthy, no matter what the cost or situation, for everyone counts more than me, and who am I to ask for anything for myself?"  Rules for Being a Good Person I must always be Right  Clean  Bright  Sane Good  Obedient Healthy No matter what the cost or situation, for everyone counts more than me, andwho am I to ask for anything for myself?  It seems that throughout my...

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