- Taschenbuch: 336 Seiten
- Verlag: Harmony; Auflage: Anniversary. (25. Juni 2002)
- Sprache: Englisch
- ISBN-10: 0609809539
- ISBN-13: 978-0609809532
- Größe und/oder Gewicht: 13,2 x 2 x 20,3 cm
- Durchschnittliche Kundenbewertung: 1 Kundenrezension
- Amazon Bestseller-Rang: Nr. 53.349 in Fremdsprachige Bücher (Siehe Top 100 in Fremdsprachige Bücher)
The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships: A 5 Step Guide for Building Better Connections with Family, Friends and Lovers (Englisch) Taschenbuch – 25. Juni 2002
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"John Gottman is our leading explorer of the inner world of relationships. In The Relationship Cure, he has found gold once again. This book shows how the simplest, nearly invisible gestures of care and attention hold the key to successful relationships with those we love and work with."
-- William J. Doherty, Ph.D., author of Take Back Your Marriage: Sticking Together in a World That Pulls Us Apart
"This is the best book on relationships I have ever read -- a truly impressive tour-de-force. John Gottman has discovered the Rosetta Stone of relationships. He has decoded the subtle secrets contained in our moment-to-moment communications. By introducing the simple yet amazingly powerful concept of the "bid," he provides a remarkable set of tools for relationship repair. By the middle of the second chapter you're likely to say to yourself, "Oh, so that's what's happening in my relationship with my partner (or colleague, boss, or sister), and now I know what to do about it."
-- Daniel B. Wile, Ph.D.,author of After the Fight: Using Your Disagreements to Build a Stronger Relationship
"The Relationship Cure is another in John Gottman's superb series of books on improving intimate relationships. What distinguishes Gottman's writing from that of other self-help books is that it is based on research findings from his extensive studies. When he says his five steps will help you build better connections with the people you care about, you know that they have been demonstrated to work."
-- E. Mavis Hetherington, Ph.D., professor of psychology, University of Virginia
"The Relationship Cure is both profound and practical, based on decades of research and clinical experience. The rich array of self-exploration exercises and guidelines offers a life-changing program for creating more rewarding emotional connections with friends, colleagues, and life partners."
-- Shirley P. Glass, ABPP, author of Treating the Trauma of Infidelity
"The Relationship Cure is engaging and imaginative. The deceptively simple but powerful concept of the 'emotional bid' reveals ways in which we can connect with significant others in our lives."
-- Andrew Christensen, Ph.D., coauthor of Reconcilable Differences
"I always expect to learn something from John Gottman, and I have never been disappointed. The Relationship Cure is original, insightful, and immensely helpful. I love the concept of emotional bids. Gottman not only helps the reader recognize how he or she may be short circuiting connection and communication, he gives them very good practical advice, as well as examples of wrong and right ways to deal with even the most aggressive or passive partner interaction."
-- Pepper Schwartz, Profesor of Sociology, the University of Washington, Seattle and author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex is Wrong
One of the nation's top relationship experts outlines his revolutionary new five-step program for repairing damaged relationships between spouses, lovers, co-workers, and family members. By the author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Reprint. 40,000 first printing.Alle Produktbeschreibungen
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The book's focus is drawn from observations of people speaking with their family, friends, and lovers. From this work, the authors have skillfully located the mechanisms that can be used to improve connection and communication, and provide much practical coaching on what the reader should work on. Anyone who follows the advice in this book will live a life filled with much richer human connections. Think of reading this book as like having an emotional intelligence coach.
The book begins by looking at the fundamental ways that connection is pursued. People say and do things to get attention and make their needs known, which the authors call bids. "People make bids because of their natural desire to feel connected with other people." How you respond determines how well the connection develops. You can use words (like questions, statements, or comments) or actions (touching, expressions, gestures, and sounds). As step one, you are encouraged to look at your own bids for connection. You want to avoid being "fuzzy" about your purposes. This can come from being ambiguous, being a poor communicator, being negative, or not acting like it is important. When you respond to bids, use a positive stance, pay attention, interact in a high energy way, and be playful. Avoid reacting mindlessly. You are especially warned against harmful ways to respond (not being mindful of your reactions, starting on a sour note, employing harmful criticism, being overcome with emotion, having a crabby way of thinking, and avoiding conversations you need to have).
The book also explores the style you use to think about communication.Lesen Sie weiter... ›
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Anyway, I already had to return this book to the library so I can only give you my impressions-- as my sister says, "the spaghetti that's stuck to the wall." So here goes:
Interactions involve people making "bids" for attention, affection, connection. When we respond successfully to others' bids, we are able to make strong and resilient relationships at home, work, school.
When someone makes a bid, you can respond either by turning toward the bid and making that connection, or by turning away from the bid by ignoring it, or by turning against it by turning it into a chance to fight.
So simple, right? Like Gottman's other books, the simple information is challenging to assimilate. I had to look at myself and realize how much turning away I do. And although I felt a little like an evil psychological mastermind, when I intentionally made bids and responded by turning toward bids at work-- wow. The sense of camaraderie and connection was palpable within a day or two.
So although reading Gottman's wonderfully empirical research can be uncomfortable, his suggestions for successful relationships are marvelously applicable.
The premise is well written. Gottman and his team have clearly done their homework over the years and looking back over my own relationship experiences, even outside of marriage, I do believe that the reasons stated for the demise of relationships are legit.
If you are serious about self-improvement and developing and maintaining healthy relationships, I suggest this guide as a reference.
It's a great read and easy to understand,
It gives you insight on the importance of HOW people communicate with one another and the consequences if we fail to do so.
A real life changer.