am 28. Dezember 1998
"How to survive..." was left on the desk in the phoneroom of a Crisis Line where I was a volunteer in 1981. It had been placed there by a counsellor who has recently lost a client to suicide. That client had given it to her on their last session. Having entered the helping field through a loss of my own, I found the book profoundly helpful to me and was soon quoting parts of it to callers where appropriate. The poetry was extremely helpful as I seemed to be able to grasp the poet's meanings easily. "Grief, it's a quiet thing" in particular, spoke to me.
Most important was the explanation of the "Grief Process," that I was still very much in at that time and many of which I have gone through since. That it can be as short as several seconds in the case of the missed phone call in the introduction, to years in the case of a divorce or death of a loved one. This was particularly helpful to a woman who had lost her husband of many years only a couple of years before her call to us. The call was prompted by the loss of a pet in the previous week. Having surrendered their children to their own lives years before, the dog had been the last living vestige of her marriage to a wonderful partner but it seems that all of her friends and family were ridiculing the depth of her grief at it's loss. Several pages of this book served to validate her experience and we ended the call on a very good note indeed.
My 32 year old daughter has recently gotten "slam-dunked" by Life and I sent her of "How to Sur-vive." That makes (25+) copies that I've been able to share... including one to her Mom when the guy she left me for moved on!
am 2. November 1999
This little easy-read handbook has helped me cope with the loss of a four-year love relationship. It made me realize I am not the only one and that everything I am feeling is totally normal. This book helped motivate me and helped me focus on ME. Be true to you...and accept the feelings you are feeling!
am 3. November 1999
The aftermath of an affair can be devastating. This wonderful book helped me cope with a terribly difficult betrayal. I had trusted my love and my life to an older married man, only to discover that his promises to leave his wife were totally untrue. I not only lost my husband, but my family and my self-esteem as well. After seriously contemplating suicide, I sought professional counseling. My therapist recommended this incredible book to me - it has changed my life. I no longer think about ending my life, I am rebuilding it. Thank you for helping me to live again!
am 18. August 1999
I was faced with a sudden loss when my fiance suddenly (phone call at 3:30am) ended our engagement for another woman he had met. I can't explain the shock and hurt that I felt. I didn't know what to do, and was frantically searching for something to ease my agony. I happened to be at the local library, and found a worn and used copy of this book. This book was a gift from God, and I don't know what I would have done without it. I had to eventually return the book, and buy one of my own. Within this book, it contained everything that I was feeling, as if the authors knew me. I have since given my original copy to a friend in need, and have of course bought a replacement. The book helped me deal with and understand the pain that I was going through, and opened my eyes to the fact that it will get better, and that the pain does not last forever.
am 20. Juli 1999
Many years ago when I was in my early 20's I broke up with a man that I was going to marry. He made the break up as difficult as possible. Over the next year, I lost 20 pounds (I was a size 2), didn't eat, and lost total control over my emotional stability. My mother gave me this book and it was a godsend to me. It gave me action steps to take everyday that finally gave me back the control I needed. Since then I have passed the book on to many people and finally after my last move I cannot find it. This book is a must for anyone and everyone who has ever lost something and mourns for it. I thank the author for sharing the wisdom that has made such a difference in my life. I will be getting a replacement and hoping I never need it.
am 30. Mai 1999
I have shared this book with friends, family, and acquaintances all over the country. It gets directly to heart of the matter, and is written so that if one page is all you can get through, one page is all you need. I had been referring to my first edition copy for all types of losses for years, when I lost my beloved brother three years ago. I found myself drifting, unable to focus, and this book went everywhere with me. It was the perfect "friend" when I needed one most. The first time I read the book I learned that grief can happen over any loss, and found that I was exactly where I was "supposed" to be each step of the way. Thank you, thank you, thank you, Melba Cosgrove, et. al.!
am 24. Dezember 1997
Never able to hold on to a copy for more than a few weeks, I am so very glad to know this book does not have to be found in used book stores any longer. Whether you missed an important phone call, lost the love of your life, or anything in between, this book is for you and those you love. The reader can identify with the stages of grief in simple terms, which is exactly what a person experiencing grief needs. Simple understanding.
I can't wait to read it again, this time, because my brother passed away. Then, I can share with all those who loved him, too.
am 31. Dezember 1998
Ive recommended this little book to others in crisis many times. Its short, yet thoughtful. It is a step by step relief process. Each time I've read it I am left feeling a little bit better before picking it up. Its not a cure-all for an aching heart, but as its text reminds you, nothing is. If you feel a need or desire to discuss this book with me, or have a story you need to tell, just e-mail me.
am 20. September 1999
I cried and laughed my way though each day of this book. The Author holds you hand, and comforts, and lets you feel the whole roller coaster ride of emotions. You'll be sad and angry; you'll cry and scream, and in the end you'll rejoice for making it. I found that the book challenged me to look at how I picked my relationships, and I picked better and more happily the next time.
am 4. Mai 1999
After a sudden and devastating breakup, this book was a God-send. I read it nearly every day for months. The authors provide very practical advice, and reassure the reader that his/her chaotic emotions are a natural part of the grieving (and healing) process. "How to Survive the Loss of a Love" is an essential purchase for anyone grieving a breakup or divorce.