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13 von 13 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Create Irresistible Positive Feedback for Virtuous Success
As a management consultant, I am always asking our clients and potential clients what their major issues are. It almost always boils down to persuading someone else to change. In many situations, the person describes the situation as getting worse rather than better. As I ask more questions, I soon learn that the person I am talking to is totally thinking about...
Veröffentlicht am 7. Juni 2000 von Professor Donald Mitchell
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19 von 20 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Don't try Carnegie's tricks on me!
This book is about making people like you. However, most of the techniques tought are much too simple and ineffective. When I was reading the book, I was surprised to recognize many little tricks people were using in order to have their way with me. These tricks were so obvious that I always wanted to ask the people: "Just how stupid you think I am? Do you...
Am 19. Februar 1999 veröffentlicht
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13 von 13 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Create Irresistible Positive Feedback for Virtuous Success, 7. Juni 2000
As a management consultant, I am always asking our clients and potential clients what their major issues are. It almost always boils down to persuading someone else to change. In many situations, the person describes the situation as getting worse rather than better. As I ask more questions, I soon learn that the person I am talking to is totally thinking about the issue from her or his perspective, not the perspective of the person they want to influence. Carnegie describes a situation where he and his son couldn't get a calf into the barn. They pushed and pulled, and nothing worked. A maid came out, stuck her finger into the calf's mouth to simulate feeding and the calf followed her right into the barn. As you can tell from that example, Carnegie is a student of the stimulus-response school of human behavior. The book is divided into four sections: Handling People; Getting People to Like You; Getting People to Agree with You; and Being a Leader. Each section is comprised of a few principles, which are each exemplified in a short chapter with a number of examples. Handling people has to do with avoiding the negative and unpleasant, appreciating the other person, and making the other person eager to accomplish some goal of their own. Each section follows the same format. Basically, it's the same way that you train any living being. You provide positive feedback to the person which makes them feel better, the person responds positively to you making you feel better, you then help the other person to link what you want to share with them with something they want. Many people will be offended by this idea. I have long studied that reaction and find that it relates to one of two basic assumptions: (1) the decision to act should be based on the objective merits (if I deal with emotions, I am being manipulative) or (2) I want you to acknowledge that I am right, that you are wrong, and that I am superior to you because I am right. Both of those perspectives get in the way of establishing warm human relationships. If you would rather do things without emotion, your life will be very dull. If you would always like to be right, you will be very lonely (even if you really are right). Let's look at a more fundamental question. Can these techniques be used for questionable purpoes? Probably, is my answer. However, at some point, the person's manipulative game will be found out. See Robert Cialdini's book, Influence, on what happens to smugglers of influence over time. The best results will come from those who have integrity and are principled. They and everyone else can see that they are pursuing something with another person that is in the best interests of that person, and that there are no hidden agendas. Here is where I think Carnegie is a little weak. You get the impression from the book that hidden agendas are okay. My experience is that all agendas should be totally upfront. Don't pretend you are trying to help someone, when all you are trying to do is sell them something they don't need. Do encourage them to get the information they need to make a good decision for themselves about your idea, product, or service. Leave the whole circumstance with a stronger, more trustworthy relationship than you started with. That's how I interpret the Dale Carnegie principles. If you really would like to get better results in your human relationships, this book is essential reading. To skip this book would be like skipping reading and arithmetic in grade school. It contains essential tools that everyone needs to understand. Since these things are seldom taught in schools, this is a good place to start. Modern gurus of human relationships and effectiveness like Stephen Covey and Tony Robbins have a substantial debt to Dale Carnegie. If you read all of them, you will tend to reinforce your new habits. I like the Covey and Robbins approaches as a complement to Carnegie, because both authors focus on having principles at the center of what you do. That will help reduce the risk of turning Carnegie into techniques that lead to suboptimal results, instead of a mutually reinforcing virtuous cycle for everyone. Researchers consistently show that success in many fields (such as business, politics, and teaching) is very closely related to one's social skills. Many people will work very hard to be more successful, but skimp on the relationship aspects. That's a mistake. Work on the relationships first. Enjoy having easier interactions with others, having more friends, being more influential on important subjects, being more open to being influenced by others, and leading where it needs doing!
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19 von 20 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Don't try Carnegie's tricks on me!, 19. Februar 1999
Von Ein Kunde
This book is about making people like you. However, most of the techniques tought are much too simple and ineffective.When I was reading the book, I was surprised to recognize many little tricks people were using in order to have their way with me. These tricks were so obvious that I always wanted to ask the people: "Just how stupid you think I am? Do you really think I'm not seeing what you're really up to?" Most of the techniques Mr. Carnegie suggested were very easy to recognize and there was no chance anybody could make me like him by using'em. At that time, I was everything but advanced in psychology. What I'm saying is that when you use Mr. Carnegie's tricks, there's a great chance that people you're dealing with will recognize them and react negatively. The book is easy to read and can certainly give you some good basics on human psychology, but if you want to be really successful in your communication, you'll need much more than Mr. Carnegie's ancient wisdom. (Besides - I can't let it be unmentioned - on a few occasions, the good old Dale Carnegie is simply wrong.) There is one more thing you should know. When Mr. Carnegie talks about "friends", he means "customers". You might make customers with his techniques, but you probably won't make any friends. In fact, you should be careful with using some of Mr. Carnegies tricks on your friends if you don't want to lose them. I'm not saying the book is bad. I'm not saying it's good either. It's mediocre, no more, no less - that's what the 3 stars're for.
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5 von 5 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Positive Feedback Creates Positive Change!, 21. Juli 2007
In business, those who are the most "emotionally" intelligent always rise to the top. Why is that?
As a management consultant, I am always asking our clients and potential clients what their major issues are. It almost always boils down to persuading someone else to change. In many situations, the person describes the situation as getting worse rather than better.
As I ask more questions, I soon learn that the person I am talking to is totally thinking about the issue from her or his perspective, not the perspective of the person they want to influence. Carnegie describes a situation where he and his son couldn't get a calf into the barn. They pushed and pulled, and nothing worked. A maid came out, stuck her finger into the calf's mouth to simulate feeding and the calf followed her right into the barn.
As you can tell from that example, Carnegie is a student of the stimulus-response school of human behavior. The book is divided into four sections: Handling People; Getting People to Like You; Getting People to Agree with You; and Being a Leader. Each section is comprised of a few principles, which are each exemplified in a short chapter with a number of examples. Handling people has to do with avoiding the negative and unpleasant, appreciating the other person, and making the other person eager to accomplish some goal of their own.
Each section follows the same format. Basically, it's the same way that you train any living being. You provide positive feedback to the person which makes them feel better, the person responds positively to you making you feel better, you then help the other person to link what you want to share with them with something they want.
Many people will be offended by this idea. I have long studied that reaction and find that it relates to one of two basic assumptions: (1) the decision to act should be based on the objective merits (if I deal with emotions, I am being manipulative) or (2) I want you to acknowledge that I am right, that you are wrong, and that I am superior to you because I am right. Both of those perspectives get in the way of establishing warm human relationships. If you would rather do things without emotion, your life will be very dull. If you would always like to be right, you will be very lonely (even if you really are right).
Let's look at a more fundamental question. Can these techniques be used for questionable purposes? Probably, is my answer. However, at some point, the person's manipulative game will be found out. See Robert Cialdini's book, Influence, on what happens to smugglers of influence over time.
The best results will come from those who have integrity and are principled. They and everyone else can see that they are pursuing something with another person that is in the best interests of that person, and that there are no hidden agendas. Here is where I think Carnegie is a little weak. You get the impression from the book that hidden agendas are okay. My experience is that all agendas should be totally upfront. Don't pretend you are trying to help someone, when all you are trying to do is sell them something they don't need. Do encourage them to get the information they need to make a good decision for themselves about your idea, product, or service. Leave the whole circumstance with a stronger, more trustworthy relationship than you started with. That's how I interpret the Dale Carnegie principles.
If you really would like to get better results in your human relationships, this book is essential reading. To skip this book would be like skipping reading and arithmetic in grade school. It contains essential tools that everyone needs to understand. Since these things are seldom taught in schools, this is a good place to start.
Modern gurus of human relationships and effectiveness like Stephen Covey and Tony Robbins have a substantial debt to Dale Carnegie. If you read all of them, you will tend to reinforce your new habits. I like the Covey and Robbins approaches as a complement to Carnegie, because both authors focus on having principles at the center of what you do. That will help reduce the risk of turning Carnegie into techniques that lead to suboptimal results, instead of a mutually reinforcing virtuous cycle for everyone.
Researchers consistently show that success in many fields (such as business, politics, and teaching) is very closely related to one's social skills. Many people will work very hard to be more successful, but skimp on the relationship aspects. That's a mistake. Work on the relationships first.
I also recommend Daniel Goleman's "Working with Emotional Intelligence" to understand these concepts and "NLP Masterclass" to help you extend these lessons with specific skills.
Enjoy having easier interactions with others, having more friends, being more influential on important subjects, being more open to being influenced by others, and leading where it needs doing!
After you finish reading this book, think about where you are trying to pull a calf where you want the calf to go.
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6 von 7 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Zeitlose Wahrheiten - wo ist das Executive Summary?, 11. September 2000
Dieses Buch enthält eine ganze menge Sachen, die eigentlich jedem von uns klar sein sollten - nur haben wir eben (im Gegensatz zu Dale Carnegie) nie richtig darüber nachgedacht... Das Ding ist heute noch genauso relevant wie damals, wenn auch die 1001 Geschichten zum Thema "wie motiviere ich meine Fließbandarbeiter" etwas aus der Zeit sind. Aber dafür mutiert man bei der Lektüre dieses Buches zum Bewunderer von Franklin Roosevelt, Abraham Lincoln und anderen berühmte Köpfen von anno dazumal. Einziger Wehrmutstropfen - Das Buch ist zu lang, man hat nach 1 Seite jedes Kapitels eigentlich verstanden was Dale uns sagen will. Trotzdem lesenswert!
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3 von 3 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Throw away all the other management books..., 16. Juli 2000
Because you dont need them anymore. This book really works. As a new supervisor, it was my responsibility to transfer a difficult employee to another section. I used the tips in this book and made it sound like a GREAT OPPORTUNITY and it turned out that she couldnt wait to leave! Even if you are not in management, read this book. It makes alot of sense, and the principles are based on common sense. D. Carnegie calls on the wisdom of great historical figures to proves his points.
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2 von 2 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Somewhat ahead of its time, 28. Juli 2000
I guess if Dale Carnegie was writing today, he would be quite a star author, since the subject which he helped to develop has become one of the most popular of all those to be found on bookshop shelves. How surprising is it then, to consider that Carnegie had such tremendous success in an epoch where a great many people would have had difficulty just coming to terms with his ideas, let alone embracing them. It seems simplistic to say that most of Carnegie's text is just plain common sense: it certainly is that. His prose is also delivered in an unequivocal fashion, but with humour. He knows what he's talking about, and he knows probably, that you or me or the next guy is going to be sceptical anyway. So he just tells it like he sees it and hopes the reader will catch the vision. Since he really hasn't got a hobbyhorse to ride, we do catch the drift (at least the millions of copies sold suggest that we do). I believe if you read this book and don't have a thoroughly enjoyable time (as you straighten out a lot of your own thinking), then it will only be because you need to come back to it in two or perhaps five years time. In addition to the above, let me say that Carnegie is also a fine writer, which helps.
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2 von 2 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
This book is timeless! I highly recommend it!, 4. Juli 2000
Von Ein Kunde
This book is timeless! I always thought the title of this book was corny, funny and "you've got to be kidding". But a friend suggested that I would like it so I read it and yes, I did like it! Dale Carnegie wrote this book in 1936 and it is amazing how many of the ideas and principles he speaks of applies to our world today. They did revise the book in 1981 so today's reader could recognize and relate to the people spoken about in the book. There are many things I liked about this book but what I found most valuable were the Principles discussed such as the one on page 62: "Be genuinely interested in other people", and the one on page 88: "Be a good listener, Encourage others to talk about themselves." The book tells you how to be a better person, how to be the best you can be, and especially relate well to others so you can have a more fulfilling satisfying life. This to me is very important. This book is fun and very interesting. It is filled with stories to compliment the different Principles discussed. I found it very enjoyable and I highly recommend it to anyone interested in learning how to communicate and relate better. Another book I recently read, enjoyed and recommend is called "Working on Yourself Doesn't Work" by Ariel and Shya Kane. This book also talks about specific Principles that are applicable and practical in today's world. The Kane's also have some great audio tapes that I purchased called: "Magical Relationships" and "Roots of Satisfaction".
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1 von 1 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Giving actually useful advice, 19. April 2009
Many of these self improvement books are completely exaggerating and talking about methods which are simply not applicable. This is, I feel, one of the books which actually are on track and give advice which is useful.
There are three parts in this book: how to make people like you, how to win people to your way of thinking and how to change people without arousing resentment. Actually, most of the people will actually know about most of the things the book suggests, but often we "know but do not realize". Ever so often I had to say to myself "Well, that's actually the way to do it and if I think of it, I somehow knew it." But these things have never before been laid out in front of me so openly. Some of the principles described in the book I already used consciously, some of them unconsciously and some where new ideas to me.
The book is not a manual giving concrete steps to take or phrases to use, but rather a guide to show you the direction to follow. The steps used to walk into the given direction must be found and taken by yourself, as they are very much dependent on the situation at hand. But there are numerous examples of how people applied the principles in certain situations. Actually most of the book consists of such examples and what the result was. Sure, Dale Carnegie uses positive examples with incredible results for illustration in his book, basically he shows the tip of the iceberg. The reader must realize that not every time one of these principles is being applied such a huge gain can result. So don't expect immediate radical changes once you start following the advice in the book, but I'm sure the general idea is correct and will yield results finally.
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1 von 1 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
A Must Read, But Should Be Combined With Common Sense !, 13. Juli 2000
Carnegie's book should be read by anyone who has any occupational human interaction on a daily basis or would just like to get along better with people on a social level. It gives good practical advise on what makes people feel comfortable with you and what behavior motivates people in most cases. The book is also somewhat dated in the fact that present business and social standards have changed dramatically since this book was written. In a pure humane world this book has a place, but in today's rough and tumble fast paced changing world this book would guide you into a Gomer Pyle reality.
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1 von 1 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich:
Gorgeous! Highly recommended!, 11. Februar 2000
I've never been a spontaneous reader of extra-curricular books apart from my textbooks. I've always been stuck into my studies, striving for success in the academic field, neglecting the inter-personal relationship. I was not until I fooled around in a bookstore and found this book-- How To Win Friends And Influence People did I realize that I had been such a foolish and self-centred person. In the book, I saw myself clearly! Having been one who never found reading a treasure, I couldn't imagine that this book can be so impressive. Once when I started reading, I couldn't help continuing. It was so gorgeous! The way the author writes is very friendly. He makes use of a easily comprehensible illustrations, straightforward principles, interesting examples and a neighbourly tone to bring about the message-- the simplest way to win friends and influence people. It really works! I cherish it very much! You shouldn't miss it!
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