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am 2. Juni 2012
This book is not poor in and out. Interesting and useful for example is Kerner's advice, that a whole day, spent together leisurely and in positive excitement, can be regarded as a foreplay, or that one should not feel embarassed about ones sexual fantasies, because they are nothing more than a mean to turn oneself on.
But it has one decisive handicap:
When he writes, that the specific male sexual inhibition is caused by an ubiquitous male tendency to protect the "family jewels", from being "chipped off", Kerner starts from the wrong theoretical assumption, namely the good old Freudian castration complex (although not calling it by name).
For example he claims that a naked man who searches his way through an unknown, dark, densely furnished room, always protects his genitals with one hand. Personally I can not confirm this. Women never missed the opportunity to tell me how typical male I am, but obviously not in this respect: I prefer to have both hands free in case I stumble upon something.
This outdated theoretical starting point makes the book all in all contradictory and confused.
For example Kerner can not solve the paradox why men on one hand are said to be anxious about the safety of their private parts and on the other hand, beginning with masturbation in puberty, are said to be exclusively fixated on their penis if they want to experience sexual pleasure. At the end of Kerners book it even turns out that it is much more difficult for the ambitious female lover to trick her partner into anal stimulation of his "male G-Spot", which only marginally belongs to the traditional "family jewels", than to get his allowance for various experiments with his most precious piece.
In a subtle way, hidden behind a "how to spice your sex-life"-tone, Kerner suggests the female reader that male sexuality per se is defect, and that she has to act like a professional therapist, or worse, like a skilled machinist, to improve things. In the last chapters, Kerner's advices are reading like directions for handling optimally a complicated machine, sometimes even unconsciously comical, neglecting the real male problem, namely to overcome the inclination to treat the own body like a machine.
Replacing the increasingly successful female struggle with the delicateness of the own sexual response by the demand also to provide her partner with an "earth shattering orgasm" predetermines another loss of unembarassement on both sides.
For a woman who just wants to be informed about male sexuality and, concerning technical details, wants to rely on her own fantasy, intuition and authentic tenderness, the "Hite Report" about this topic is in my opinion the still unequaled classic.
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