323 von 335 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
- Veröffentlicht auf Amazon.com
Format: Gebundene Ausgabe
Last year was a duzzy. So many things went wrong in my life, that I wondered if I'd get through the year intact. Feeling as down as I did, I'd been looking for books that might give me some help with restructuring my life and my attitude. This one is the best of those that I've read so far.
M. J. Ryan's book "This Year I Will..." is considerably more helpful than any other self-help book primarily because she is far more precise in her approach to change. She's also very up front with the fact that change is not going to come instantaneously or easily. Whether it's as simple as putting the laundry detergent in before the wash or after it (her own experience) or trying to lose weight or quit smoking, it will take time and hard work, and there are no handy short cuts about it.
This may be disappointing to those of us who would like a quick fix to our problems and who find dealing with them frustrating, time consuming, and sometimes expensive--remember all those health clubs, weight loss programs, clinics, and magic potions that purport to make weight loss "easy" but at great cost? Don't get discouraged; read on. The author gives points for past "failures" and looks at them as, more-or-less, "first attempts" rather than as a sign of our inability to make changes in our lives. Furthermore, she also tells you why this is so.
Unlike many of the self-help books out there, Ryan's gives you an explanation of why you have a hard time changing, and why it's important to get back on that "bicycle" and try again. It's quite obvious that she is an extensively read professional. Using very up to date information from the recent discoveries in mind-brain research, she describes the neurological processes that go into making our bad habits so difficult to eradicate.
Without going into endless, unintelligible detail, she describes the processes by which our bodies make responses that have been found "successful" more permanent and automatic. She describes the various parts of the brain, their origin, and how they work together--or sometimes don't--so that it is clear why we sometimes resist making those changes we should or even must to survive. Without getting down to the circuitry or the chemistry, she points out that the higher levels of brain function, which can make executive decisions regarding the wisdom of change, may be subverted by the more basic levels of automatic behavior. Responsible for the flight-fight response and for the safety and wellbeing of the organism this more emotional brain may not be willing to help. Might in fact even work at cross purposes.
Ms Ryan explains that neuropathways become hardwired in our brains to the point where they are virtually ineradicatable . It is often said in books on mind-brain research, "nerves that fire together wire together," and as the author says, you're stuck with them.
What she proposes is not brain surgery to remove the troublesome pathway but developing a new pathway that competes with the old one. She points out that it takes a lot of time and work to create such a competitive behavior, but that with each successful effort to do so, the nerves responsible for the behavior become more habituated to the activity, making it easier with time.
Ryan also notes that we WILL have lapses as we go, because those old pathways are pretty powerful. Just having given it a try, though, has already started to initiate the changes desired--at least we now have a wagon to fall off of. She has several good recommendations on how to gradually bypass that old pathway and even several alternative approaches for some tasks.
The book is arranged in a graduated format of chapters, each one giving in a short few pages the information you need at each point in your effort to change. I read the book cover to cover first in about two hours, then I began at the beginning and started following some of her suggestions. Each chapter becomes sort of a "workbook" of things to do at each level of the change process.
The author also makes reference to other writers on the subject of personal change that have interesting things to add, and it is obvious that she does not work in a vacuum but in collaboration with others in the field; in short she's open minded. So there are other resources to which you may turn as need arises.
Probably one of the most important points she makes is that one needs to be definite about which change you're willing to make the effort to undertake. Global responses make taking action on anything impossible, so you have to select your changes with care. She also suggests that the problem be specific, with clearly defined behaviors needed to accomplish your goal and a clear means of evaluating the change. She makes a point of noting that monitoring the progress of your change is important, partially because it gives a clear measure of success and partially because it provides the satisfaction of actually seeing your efforts worth their expense. Ryan even sees back sliding as a means of assessing your progress and as an opportunity to evaluate what works and what doesn't, and thereby to make appropriate changes in your plan.
An excellent book, very precise in its recommendations.