The Natural Child: Parenting from the Heart is refreshing, well written and full of important insight about parenthood and childhood. It's the kind of book that makes you think how different the world would be if everyone read it.
In her passionate and poignant collection of essays, Jan Hunt repeats this simple dictum often enough for it to become something of a mantra: "All children behave as well as they are treated". As mantras go, it's a pretty good one. It serves as an excellent reminder for the harried, outnumbered mother when a meltdown (hers or her child's) is imminent. It's also a bracing dose of truth for parents who have never questioned the conventional wisdom in which child rearing in our culture is mired.
This book is a marvelously validating read for anyone who has been accused of "spoiling" his or her children by responding to their cries too quickly or too frequently, favoring creative conflict resolution over punishments, or who is struggling to swim against the tide of mainstream parenting "rules".
Hunt presents a grounded, well-researched case for a return to the age-old methods of parenting that are now called "empathic" or "attachment" style. Citing sources that range from anthropologist Jean Liedloff and pediatrician Dr. William Sears to the Book of Corinthians and the European Charter of Children's Rights, Hunt addresses the challenges of raising children with respect and compassion in a society where childhood is often viewed as a noisome aberration that must be quelled at all costs.
The book contains several of Hunt's more well known essays, including "A Baby Cries: How Should Parents Respond?", "Ten Reasons to Respond to a Crying Child", and a personal favorite of mine, "Ten Ways We Misunderstand Children". Hunt is at her best in the latter, writing simply and eloquently of parents' unrealistic expectations and of the hurtful result of criticism and mistrust. "We forget what it was like to be a child and expect our children to act like adults instead of acting their age," she writes. "A healthy child will have a short attention span, and be rambunctious, noisy, and emotionally expressive." It's the kind of essay that you want to post in every pediatrician's office, portrait studio, toy store, mommy-and-me classroom, and anywhere else young children are fidgeting.
Hunt also gives, in essays such as "Ten Tips for Shopping With Children", "Ten Alternatives to Punishment", and "Intervening on Behalf of a Child in a Public Place" some concrete advice for meeting the daily challenges of supermarkets, playgrounds, and sibling rivalries. There are some helpful alternatives to the ideas and methods found in mainstream parenting magazines. Hunt gives outstanding, off-the-beaten-path sources for parenting information and excellent advice.
