I read this book because I love Edgerton's novels and hoped to gain insight into the author's life and writing. The book did not fulfill this hope. It's not an autobiography-it's the story of Edgerton's love affair with flying at different stages of his life. However, even though the book did not provide me with what I had hoped, I enjoyed it and recommend it to others.
The book is thematically divided into four parts. The first describes Edgerton's training to be a fighter pilot and his growing obsession with flight. It starts with a trip to an airport at age four and ends when Edgerton is sent oversees as a combat pilot. For me this part was not compelling, because I have no interest in flying. There are long and technical explanations of such things as thrust and trim. In some sections, it reads like a manual. You can skim through this part, just to get a flavor of the training and of the determination that Edgerton had to fly, but it's not of interest to the general public in my opinion.
Next comes a section devoted to Edgerton's combat career in the late sixties and early seventies in Japan (flying nuclear-readiness missions) and then in Vietnam/Laos, flying combat reconnaissance missions. I enjoyed this section very much. Edgerton is able to convey the feeling of control and freedom, the thrill of flying. He also describes the clammy fear of combat. The best section describes a failed recovery attempt of pilots whose aircraft was shot down. Edgerton's description of his growing desperation and sadness as he realizes that nothing can be done for the lost pilots is moving. Edgerton earned the Distinguished Flying Cross for his valiant and persistent efforts to help the downed pilots, despite coming under anti-aircraft fire.
The most interesting aspect of the combat section is the essential theme/conflict of the book. Edgerton gamely faces up to the disconnect between the experiences of the pilots and the result of their actions. For the pilots the Vietnam experience was, by and large, a huge thrill, a power trip and a dream come true. Despite the fear, Edgerton and his fellow pilots loved flying and were empowered by their experiences. They spent precious little time considering the impact of their actions. They never really considered the death and destruction they caused. As a marture adult, Edgerton tries to make sense of this disconnect. He can't resolve the problem, but he engages with it. I was surprised that he was not able to see that governments for millennia (and even now) are able to go to war because they CAN exploit young men's natural thrill seeking and lack of moral experience. It would be much harder to send forty-five year olds to pointless wars <smile>.
The third section of the book deals with Edgerton's flying experiences after he left the air force. I found this section of little interest, but I think a flight enthusiast might feel differently.
In the final section, Edgerton ponders the above mentioned moral conflicts and muses over the nature of courage. This is an excellent section and makes the entire book worth reading. It could and perhaps should have been expanded further.
I enjoyed the book, but it does not compare with the brilliance of Edgerton's novels. In his novels, every word is in place - they are perfectly crafted. This book has too many words and not all of them are needed. There is some humor, but Edgerton's brilliant use of satire is entirely missing.
I was also disappointed that Edgerton chose to share so little of his life with us. Although he mentions his parents frequently, he shares next to nothing about his childhood. Nor do we learn much about his adult life. There are little facts thrown in, but no background with which to interpret them. This weakens the book. Read Tony Hillerman's recent autobiography and you'll see what I mean.
I was a little surprised at Edgerton's lack of engagement with religion, since much of the book is about a moral dilemma. He mentioned being a churchgoer when younger, but devoted no time to what I think must be addressed when thinking about morality and war.