Sex God: Exploring the Endless Connections Between Sexuality and Spirituality [Englisch] [Taschenbuch]

Yes, this book is about that.

Rob Bell delves into the link between our sexuality and our spirituality, and the result is a work that will open your eyes to the relationship that God seeks with humanity.

The basic premise is that we are all broken, always seeking a connection with others since our connection with God has been severed. We all want to be known and accepted as we are. Only God can provide us with this, but sex is the next best thing. So we all walk around with distorted concepts of who we are, searching for that connection through physical relation rather than spiritual.

The book is engaging, and Bell has a talent for teaching by using stories(sound familiar?). He is able to weave Bible history, Jewish customs, and contemporary culture together to form a picture of the relationship God desires with mankind. I especially enjoyed a passage on page 70 that describes that Garden of Eden as good, and for it to be truly good, it couldn't be forced on people. Hence, the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

A few criticisms, however:

On page 63 Bell describes the universe as unfinished. He claims that "God's intent in creating these people was for them to continue the work of creating the world, moving it away from chaos and wild and waste and formlessness toward order and harmony and good."

I just can't agree with that statement. When God created the universe, it was good. He rested on the seventh day, content with His creation. There was "order and harmony and good." Then we, humanity, screwed it up. I get the gist of what he's saying, but the statement just doesn't make sense.

The other problem is on pages 20 and 22. Bell discusses a passage in which Jesus says "If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away." Bell later states "And that's Jesus' point with the "gouge out your eye" teaching. His point isn't that you should mutilate your body if you find yourself lusting after someone. His point is that something serious--sometimes hellish--happens when people are treated as objects, and we should resist it at all costs."(p.22)

I agree with him on his thoughts on people(specifically women) being treated as objects, but I don't think Jesus is just saying that bad things will happen when we sin. To me, Jesus is calling us to a higher level of spirituality. He goes on to say it is better to lose parts of your body than to lose your soul(paraphrased). This means that a life dedicated to God means a neglect of yourself.(Read more about this at The Humble Way blog) I think Bell slightly twists a verse to suit his topic.

Bell is also reluctant to name the author of epistles such as 1st Corinthians, etc. I don't know why, and it's not a big deal. I just wonder why. And, on a more petty note, this guy drops geographic names like Carmen San Diego:

"...I was in Canada..", "...stayed at a wildlife lodge in Africa.", "I was in London..". These are just some of the examples. I'm just saying, dude travels a lot. Maybe I'm just jealous.

But seriously, this is a book I would actually recommend spending money on, and it's also worth your time. Some people criticize Rob Bell for being weak theologically, and I can see their point. I wouldn't go to him for Bible commentary. But he definitely has insight into relationships, especially those concerning people and God. Read this expecting the relational side of God's love to be revealed.

First of all, this book is not so much about that, despite the title. The title almost immediately sets you up for an anti-climactic rest of the book. The title is good marketing, but not necessarily truth in advertising. This is ok. Buying this book is not about that.

Think about why you bought it first. You bought it because you really like Rob Bell, and in your mind you run through conversations that you'd like to have with him when you two are hanging out at Starbucks, which I'm sure he'll have time for. Given that that's what this is about, just realize that you're getting the next best thing. You're hanging out with him. He's talking about what's on his mind. You get to listen in. Even though it's a monologue, it kind of scratches that itch that all of his fans have been having.

So for that reason, it's a pretty good book.

In keeping with the postmodern, emergent ethos, which Bell leads while disavowing, the book is not linear. He starts out with a provocative introduction which broaches the sacramental without using that word, and then a powerful first chapter that reaches into our deepest longings for the dignity for which we were created. Immediately we are on board and want more. Particularly in hopes that he gets to the s-e-x.

The second chapter skirts around our "disconnection" from the created order, which makes me wonder if we're walking through a systematic theology of creation, sin, salvation (I was soon dissuaded). I'm also wondering if we've taken on a neo-Tillichian doctrine of sin-as-victimization, but I don't think the book's theology is quite so intentional.

The third chapter I like even better, as a modern discourse on the first three chapters of Genesis and the thoughtful suggestion that our sexuality is poised between our place as animal and angel, as physical and spiritual beings. Now I'm really into this book. Chapter four plays with the temptations and addictions that throw us off course from that dignity we wanted at first. Chapter five looks at our reaching out for love to fix the hurt, portrayed through the clever and playful illustration of a little girl running away from Rob Bell when he asked her to dance in Junior High. I think we're supposed to say, "Oh, good choice, girlie, look where you'd be now." The cross is God's act of making himself vulnerable to our rejection in the same way.

Now here's the break. From here on out, the structure is not too clear to me, and, from what I read, to other reviewers. Six is about couples needing to submit to each other rather than women to men. Seven is (subtly) about retaining the mystery of sex within marriage. Eight is about loyalty, nine is an implied analogy between heaven and marital intimacy, and ten is an offer of forgiveness for those who have failed.

Then I realized what I was reading. It's not systematic theology; it's the emergent "Why Wait?" program. Which is fine. I just wanted to hang out with Rob Bell, and when I got the chance, he had sex on his mind. Cool. I like listening to him, whatever he's talking about.

My only two suggestions for his third book are these. First, the endnotes are not cute, and it is not impressive to see how many books you can recommend. They perforate a book that already requires attention. Secondly, pensees do not need to be released in hardback at twice the cost of a paperback.

Those aside, it's a worthwhile recommendation for the religiously exposed who don't really understand Christian mores regarding physical intimacy.

I agree with other reviewers that the title of the book is misleading (whether this is a reflection of crafty marketing or Rob Bell's uber-creative whimsy is debatable). This misnaming is unfortunate, because I think it confuses the reader (myself included) as to the overall goal of the book. However, a simple addition of a "/" renders the title more accurate: "Sex/God." As Bell emphasizes in his introduction, "This" (sexuality, intimacy, marriage,) is always about "That" (God and his loving relationship with humanity).

When read this way, I think the book becomes more coherent and compelling. In fact, I think it is one of the most inspiring theological statements on love, marriage, and intimacy that I have read. Rather than the typical, predictable, shallow Christian answers to defend traditional marriage and sexual purity, Bell provides a sweeping vision of how our intimate relationships reflect the self-giving love of our Creator. Not only that, but our self-giving love for one other person actually helps to manifest God's love to many other people. Even the pain of a failed relationship reflects the pain God feels and the risk God takes by loving us humans. Bell challenges us to think of sex, intimacy, and marriage in the most holy and reverent - yet also in the most realistic and practical - of ways.

Through all this, "Sex God" cleverly and somewhat subtly tells us as much about "God" as it does about "Sex." While we think we are reading about human relationships, we find ourselves learning about the Gospel - God's supreme love for us, manifest most explicitly in the sacrificial love of Jesus. "This" is really about "That."

"Sex God" is biblically grounded, yet never in predictable ways. I always enjoy Bell's trademark usage of vivid cultural context. His exegesis on the early chapters of Genesis and the latter verses of Revelation were particularly interesting, and he provides new insights to many well known passages.

I also appreciate Bell's concluding pages, which show sensitivity to people who are not married or dating without sounding patronizing. After spending an entire book extolling the Godly virtues of giving yourself wholly to another person, Bell reminds single people that, according to Jesus himself, they actually have a higher calling than the rest of us. And he also offers hope to people who have experienced failed and abusive relationships.

Much more could be said here, but suffice it to say that I am very eager to share this book with both my teen child and the college students with whom I work. And I immediately assigned the book to a couple for our premarital counseling sessions. "Sex God" is that good.