As somebody who's read quite a few of these "saving our daughters from stereotypes and hyper-sexualization" books, "Redefining Girly" might be the lightest one I've seen when it comes to statistical references. While it has some good suggestions, the book mostly consists of author Melissa Atkins Wardy holding up her raising of her daughter Amelia (and son Benny) as a shining example of how to raise children, and holding up her company Pigtail Pals & Ballcap Buddies as a shining example of a strike back in the war against female stereotyping. (Verbatim quote, emphasis mine: "My social media sites and blog are active *and incredible* places for discussion as parents unpack and digest what is going on around their girls.") We hear a lot about how smart the kids are, how Amelia is into science (how many times can Wardy remind us that she named her daughter after Amelia Earhart?), how Benny knows it's okay to like pink things, et cetera. It's less a conversation about stereotyping and more a mom bragging about her kids, and it gets old really fast. Wardy telling us that Amelia's nickname is Smalls constitutes an example that you can nickname a little girl lots of things besides Princess. Wardy taking a whole paragraph to tell us that Amelia's nicknames are (deep breath) Lia, Chippy, Choodle, "my babes," Pumpkin, Sweetie Bee, Smooch, Amelia Dinosaur, Smalls, Beetle, Rascal Pants, "Amelia My Girl," Buddy, Nama, and Mia - complete with who in the family calls her which, and why - constitutes Wardy indulging in eye-glaze-inducing mom-bragging.
I agree with a lot of Wardy's basic ideas, but the way she suggests people implement them left me annoyed and frustrated. I found biases against stay-at-home moms (Wardy suggests that if your daughter tells you she's going to be a mommy when she grows up, the appropriate response is to tell her a story about how much you love being a mommy "but I also like that I support our family by working and traveling for a job I love" - why not just accept that your daughter might decide to make a different choice about motherhood than you did?) and assumptions that readers are all upper-middle-class to upper-class (working-class parents don't usually spend their money on Italian sodas and American Girl dolls).
Wardy also contradicts herself at several points. While she emphasizes repeatedly that "colors are for everyone" and there's nothing wrong with pink as a color, she later mentions that "all [the toys in her house] are primary colored or have gender-neutral tones." After telling us how play should be directed by children's imaginations, not adults, she then proceeds to give suggestions as to how to shape how your daughter plays with her dolls: "Can Barbie run a safari camp or be the head organizer for the Paralympics? Maybe the princess dolls can run a school for girls in the hills of Nepal or a sanctuary for a rare species of bear found only in Montana? Can you help your daughter build a mini organic farm for Barbie in the back yard?" This strikes me as being just as agenda-driven as someone suggesting that their daughter play "fashion show" or "princess" with her dolls. It's just a different agenda. I didn't much care for Wardy's ideas about putting girls in sports, either; as somebody who had the opportunity to play sports as a kid but just wasn't interested - and was made to feel weird because of it - I get sick of people insisting that girls all need to play some kind of sport. As with the stay-at-home- or working mom thing, why not just acknowledge that people have different interests? I also found a brief section about Wardy's sexual past to be off-putting and "TMI" - when I read a book about "how parents can fight the stereotyping and sexualizing of girlhood," I don't expect to find the author reflecting on her high-school history of having sex with boys and what happened with she denied them "a hook-up or a blow job."
Although I agree that little girls are subjected to a lot of stereotypical expectations and there's too much sexualized material geared towards them, and although Wardy has a few useful tips, I didn't particularly like this book. It's too self-congratulatory, too didactic, and references the author's company too many times for me to not suspect that she wrote it partly to pat herself on the back and generate some business revenue.