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How to Raise a Sex Offender. It's Easy. Prevention is Hard. (English Edition) [Kindle Edition]

LICSW Jane F. Gilgun Ph.D.

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This article begins with what parents can do to help their children become sex offenders. There are only a few simple steps. Just follow them. A lot of people do it. You can, too. Please note that this is satire. Next I discuss what parents and a concerned public can do to prevent children from becoming sex offenders. This section is not satire. Prevention is hard. People must really want to do it. Apparently, not enough of us do. So, we will keep on raising hundreds of thousands of children a year to be sex offenders. Is that what we want? The author is a professor who has done research on child sexual abuse and its prevention for more than 30 years.


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Mehr über den Autor

I like to laugh. I like witty people. I write children's stories, articles, and books about qualitative research, resilience, violence, child development, and US politics. Sometimes I write something humorous. I spend a lot of time with my horses, Padron's Elegante and Finn MacCool who are mother and son. I have videos on youtube about them.

Besides writing, I enjoy photography, gardening, cooking, boating, nature, and Ireland. I lived in Belgium for two years as a student and have spent happy times in Germany while I lived in Belgium. I also have spent a lot of time in Ireland and England.


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Amazon.com: 2.5 von 5 Sternen  2 Rezensionen
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1.0 von 5 Sternen How to not write a book 9. Februar 2011
Von Jason Martin - Veröffentlicht auf Amazon.com
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
In Feb 2011, I wrote a review for this book. It was one of many books I read on the topic in an attempt to understand it. My desire in life is always to discover where the truth "lies" so to speak, and a friend of mine was working on a book on the topic and asked me to look at it in an editorial capacity, but since I didn't feel that I had a grasp of the topic I did what I always do and read voraciously anything I could find. By the time I got Jane's book, I was pretty fed up with the whole thing, the lack of anything resembling objectivity, and the constant drone of pop-psychology and "olds" as Pratchet called them.

I don't think that I was fair in my review of this Article, her Article is not actually all that bad, though I still maintain that she is incorrect in her assessment and that her suggestions are naive and come from a lack of understanding about human behavior. I don't really care if she has researched the topic for 30 years, or has a Ph. D. I don't fall for an "appeal to authority". There are Christian Theologians who research the young earth theory for that long or longer, or research any other kind of nonsensical topic and maintain completely naive ( I won't say ignorant) views.

I do regret that my review was so popular and may have dissuaded people from paying the paltry buck to read it. I do believe that Jane has the best intentions, and I think that I was very inconsiderate of her in being so heavy handed and cocky.

In all fairness, I did not read "the whole thing" at the time, but gave up about halfway through when I realized that it was more of the same naive "speaker-on-the-circuit" recommendations. I have now, with some difficulty, re-read the entire thing, from start to finish.

The Article is a presentation of a conscientious authoritarian's idea of cause and prevention of the phenomenon. This is not to be insulting,
"Prevention of sexually abusive behaviors is in the forefront of public discussions today. The costs of committing sex offenders to indefinite detention is draining public budgets and taking funds away from education and public safety. For the public good, resources must shift to prevention and not remain focused on detention."

This can hardly be considered a valid reason for investigating the topic. I don't care what it takes, or how much it takes, and we should ask ourselves about the "nature" of a world where the investigation into the causes and treatment of sexual predation should ever need to appeal, or predominantly appeal to fiscal concerns. The very idea is incredible, but speaks to the type of audience consuming, and researcher presenting.

"They are not born as sexual abusers. They learn to abuse children sexually. This learning begins in childhood. "

This is bizarre on several levels. But illustrates the core "nurture" component of her argument.

"They learn that sexual behaviors with children feel good, lift their mood, or make them feel loved."

Most people learn that sex feels good. Some people think sex with apple pies feels good, or as that character's friend in that movie thought that sex felt like apple pie. This is like saying water is wet.

1. have experienced sensitive, responsive, and contingently reciprocal relationships with other people over time, typically with their parents and also with others; This shows a history of secure attachments;
2. can experience, identify, and express appropriately a range of feelings;
3. understand and identify with (empathize with) the emotions of others;
4. encourage the healthy emotional expression of others; and
5. have good executive skills as shown by their flexible thinking and problem-solving abilities that includes capacities for considering alternative and for thinking through consequences of their actions.

This "leave it to beaver" checklist is not really helpful. What you have described is the perfect situation. Not gonna happen, never has, and probably never will. It has also be shown that executive skills are dependent on brain development (nature), and that all manner of issues with the pre-frontal cortex and other aspects of the brain, can lead to the impossibility of ever developing the necessary executive abilities. Developmental issues can be caused by any number of factors: Parent's genetics, Diet during pregnancy, being too hot, too cold, dropped, stressed and so on during early infancy. In fact, considering the delicate nature of child physical development, it's a wonder we survive at all sometimes.

I would point out that there have been a number of instances of children being raised in contrary environments who develop deep empathy, perspicacity, and despite mental disturbance and PTSD symptoms, do not turn out to be child molesters. What about Fred and Rose's children? By these standards they should all be mass murdering prostitutes and pimps.

I am NOT saying that "nurture has nothing to do with it", I think it has been demonstrated to have a profound effect on child development, and all of the above are good things. But they are belling the cat, even assuming "the bell" would solve the issue.

It is the scientific equivalent of Christians "return to family values" line when it comes to crime, sin, immorality and all that jazz. Same dance, different tune.
In the case of "perpetrators" who have had somewhat satisfactory childhoods compared to the above list she writes "What may happen in these cases is that parents have been permissive, and not authoritative. Authoritative parents combine unconditional love, clear rules, simple rewards for following rules, and appropriate penalties for breaking rules."
Really? Authoritarian much? Much too much.

"Since some perpetrators are unable to provide the details needed to draw direct conclusions and because they show an incredible insensitivity and lack of responsiveness themselves, the logical conclusion is that they did not experience their parents as sensitive and responsive and did not as a result develop these capacities themselves. This does not mean that their parents had no capacities for emotional responsiveness. It does mean that some perpetrators as children were unable to respond to whatever parents and others were able to offer them that might have helped them to develop emotionally and to develop good executive skills."

Really? Are you serious? Which logic did you learn, cause that does not seem logical to me.

"In general, boys are at a disadvantage as compared to girls in their opportunities for optimal emotional development and for the acquisition of good executive skills in interpersonal relationships. "

More pop-psych BS. As a dude, I am really getting frustrated with this: " boys are at a disadvantage because blah blah."

"Boys and men perpetrate up to 90% of all sexual abuse."

This is just plain ignorant. There is no reason for a person who has researched this field for 30 years, with a Ph. D. no less, to make such a sweeping an ignorant statement.
As Allen (1990, p. 111) states, "women are socialised to be the victims of child sexual abuse, not the perpetrators." And this is a fundamental problem in the entire field. I consider it the litmus test as to whether or not a person actually thinks about the topic, or not, and whether or not they actually have something meaningful to say.

Most, if not all theories of child sexual abuse focus exclusively on male "power" and their tendency to "subordinate" women. In many cases this is attributed to how boys compare to girls on the playground.

We don't seem to find it difficult to believe that women will physically abuse their children, or emotionally abuse them, in which case rates are very high, but the idea that they would also sexually abuse them is enuntianda. Women, as reported by Featherstone (1996) and Parker (1995), perpetrate up to 50% of all physical violence against children. 49% of children experiencing violence in the home reported the mother opposed to 40% reporting the father (Cawson,Wattam,Brooker and Kelly 2000).

"Some studies present a slightly different picture, although the rates are often still quite low. Allen (1990) cites Finkelhor's (1986) conclusion that in the general population, women commit 5%of abuse of girls and 20%of abuse of boys. Harrison and Cobham (1993) reported that 9% of abusers reported to ChildLine were female and that boys were more likely than girls to be abused. ChildLine figures for the year 2004/5 reveal that overall 11%of callers about sexual abuse were calling about a female abuser. Further breakdown of these figures indicated that 3% of 6,538 girls calling about sexual abuse were calling about a female and that 2% of the girls calling about a female abuser were calling about their mothers. Meanwhile, 35% of the 2,099 boys calling about sexual abuse were calling about a female abuser and 17% of the boys calling about a female were calling about their mothers (ChildLine, personal communication).


It is certainly significant, as Mendel (1995) notes, that self- report studies find higher rates of female abuse than those relying on officially reported cases.


Studying a sample of African-American men, Duncan and Williams (1998) reported that 51% of the men described sexual abuse by a female while 57% reported being abused by a male. Denov
(2003a) emphasises the disparity between the two sources of data with, she notes, official data suggesting prevalence rates for female sexual abuse of between 1.2% and 8 %, while some self-report data suggest a prevalence rate of 58 %.

- Women who sexually abuse children by Hannah Ford"

At this point, we are at 4 A4 pages, which is really too long for a review of an article. I may just turn it into a kindle book of my own as a response to the ridiculous nature of the claims made in this article.

I apologize that I don't have time to go point by point through the rest of the article. Practically every single paragraph in the second half of the article is filled with presupposition and error in both thinking and facts.


This book was a complete disappointment. The only parody/farce, is that this person actually thinks they have anything to say on the subject.

This book will be no help to parents, no help to researchers, no help to anyone at all. It is nothing more than than a pedestrian attempt to be funny and sensational that fails miserably.

In the author's eyes, everything that could possibly happen to a child in the negative will immediately make them a child-molester. The focus seems to mainly be on psychopathic perpetrators, which presupposes a nurture based genesis of psychopathic behavior. The usual parade of horrors is carted out to make simplistic and unhelpful points and suggestions. Obviously the author has been won over by the tear jerking accounts from psychopaths of their horrible treatment as children.

This book is just a sad joke. I regret buying this book.
2 von 2 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
4.0 von 5 Sternen Many good points for ending abusive patterns 16. Juli 2012
Von Amazon Customer - Veröffentlicht auf Amazon.com
Format:Kindle Edition
Abuse tends to come from neglect or from abusers. Children do not know social norms, so growing up in a home where dad hits mom says that is what parents do. If dad or mom also hit you, that is NORMAL to the child. It takes recognition that loving couples do not beat upon one another EVER and that hitting a child repeatedly is abuse. (Sorry folks, I still believe that a single smack to the hiney when a small child is doing something they shouldn't and you need to impress the point is acceptable. Ex. small child lets go of your hand in parking lot and takes off running. If child avoids getting crunched by a car, which would bring home the lesson of WHY we hold hands in a much more painful way, If parent uses single spank to get attention and gets down at child's level to calmly explain that 'I am sorry that I had to do that, but it is to help you learn that running alone where there are cars is dangerous and we have this rule for your safety. I don't want you to get hurt'. Of course this should never leave marks on your child. You are only getting their full attention by doing something well out of the ordinary.)

It is important to educate children about sex and answer their questions. If they are learning from one another, they are misinformed. If an older person is teaching them, it is probably a coercive situation. The child should be able to ask their own parent and get a clear answer, even if it means pulling out a book and discussing it together. Do not hand the kid a book and send them off to read it.

And parents...as a mom of two nearly grown children, there is not just one 'talk' with your kid. We have had talks from the first time I heard about crushes, kissing, and have talked through their friends having pregnancy scares. A lady that we provided aid to was the mother of two sets of twins. She told me that she didn't know how she got pregnant the first time because she was only with a boy once. She was fourteen at the time. Nobody spoke with her much about the mechanics of making babies because the next set of twins came when she was 17, and was dating a boy for the first time. She still had not talked with any of her four daughters about sex and the eldest were in middle school.

Come on people. Wake up. Boys should know that if a girl says 'no' that it means NO MORE. (Girls too...Boys can also be forced.) Causing harm to another is not okay. Do not take what is not yours. No one is entitled to anything. We all come into the world naked and we leave this world taking nothing with us. We should care enough to work with local charities so that ALL have enough to eat, have clothing to stay warm, and a place to go where they can feel safe. If we can meet these needs and then also convince our teens that not everyone must have this brand of sneakers or that brand of jeans to be COOL then we will actually start getting somewhere.

I still remember my older sister telling me before my first day in preteen anxiety (junior high) --- Do not sit with anyone carrying a lunchbox and avoid people with high water pants (too short). Converse are the only cool shoes. My class to go to lunch with ends and a quiet voice to my right asks if I would like to sit together in the cafeteria. She is sitting in front of a boy from my neighborhood, who was on the bus with my loud mouthed sister and all her advice. She has a Cinderella lunchbox. Her jeans are faded (we did not have prewashed at that time) and well up her calf. She is wearing no-name sneakers...the Keds wanna be's they sell at KMart. Can you hear my sister taunting? I said "Sure". This young lady is smart, funny, and a very good friend. She lives far away, but we have tried to stay in touch. She was a bridesmaid in my wedding over 20 years ago. It was a good thing those rules were ignored. A couple of my lifelong friends would not have made that image cut...but their hearts are much bigger than their desire to keep up with trends.
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