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Phone Kitten: A Cozy, Romantic, and Highly Humorous Mystery (English Edition)

Phone Kitten: A Cozy, Romantic, and Highly Humorous Mystery (English Edition) [Kindle Edition]

Marika Christian
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Think "Bridget Jones meets Nancy Drew". Throw in a gig as a phone sex operator, an unexpected hunk of a boyfriend, and a client's murder, and you have all the ingredients for the perfect chick lit romp.

Even bloggers at Trashionista just had to read it: “When I first heard of this book I was intrigued; a phone-sex worker turned sleuth? Sounds like the perfect mix ... A fabulous book.”

Shy, funny, loveable Emily’s a pretty unlikely candidate for a phone sex operator. She’d die if she had to talk dirty face-to-face—especially to her hot cop boyfriend. She sure didn’t set out to do phone sex—she wanted to be a writer. But when her BFF framed her for plagiarism, she got in a tiny financial hole and saw this ad for a “phone actresses”…

Hey, it’s not nearly as bad as it sounds. No pantyhose or pantsuits, no regular hours, you’re your own boss, and lots of people to talk to. Guys, that is. But here’s the odd thing—lots of them want to talk about more than Emily’s imagined attributes; they start to think of her as the best friend they’ll never have to meet. Next thing you know, one of her customers gets killed. What’s a phone kitten to do? Solve the murder herself, of course!

Phone Kitten was a fun debut read with an interesting premise and some great characters – excellent chick lit.” -The Brazen Bookworm

“Marika Christian's debut novel was one of the most fun reads I have had this year. Sweet Emily taking a job as a 'phone actress' has to be one of the funniest things ever.” -Just Jump

A fun, refreshing treat for fans of Jennifer Crusie, Janet Evanovich, and Stephanie Bond, Phone Kitten is your ticket to hours of giggles—so long as you’re not looking for raunch. Because this is so not it!

The girl who answered the phone sounded a lot like me. She was perky, upbeat, and wanted me to come in that night for an interview. The thought terrified me, but my only other option was Walmart. I heard Walmart locks employees in the store. I've often wondered what would happen if one of the employees were pregnant and went into labor while locked up. Would they let her out? Would her supervisor deliver the baby in housewares and slap a little smiley face sticker on the baby's bottom? Phone sex had to be better than twenty-four hour retail.

The company name was Dimensions. Located in the back of an industrial park, it was a little scary. There was a gravel parking lot with a dozen cars and only one door with a camera to capture anyone who pressed the call button. I was buzzed in immediately. I wondered, Why does a phone sex place need this much security?

I was met by Taylor, the bubbly girl I talked to on the phone. “Come on, I'll take you in the back and we can talk.”

She wasn't what I pictured. Taylor was a tattooed Goth chick, with every piercing imaginable. Taylor isn't what most people envisioned when it came to “bubbly.”

Once we were in her office, she quickly closed the door. “Look, we talk dirty here. The language is sexually explicit. You have to say it all. Tits, cock, and fuck. Can you do that?”

“Yes.” There, I said it. I said I could do it. I hoped I really could.

She whipped out a headset, plugged it in, and said, “I want you to listen to a call. We get a lot of girls who come in here and think they can do it, and then freak out on their first call. It really pisses me off. You aren't going to piss me off, are you?”

Taylor didn't seem like the type of girl I wanted to piss off. I put on the headset and listened as a girl named Raven guided some guy through the “manipulation of his instrument.” Like a man really needs that type of instruction. There were moans, groans, panting—even a few noises I couldn't identify—and that was just from her. He screamed once, and then it was over. Raven went on to her next call. It occurred to me that freaking out wasn't going to be my problem. Trying not to laugh w


  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • Dateigröße: 437 KB
  • Seitenzahl der Print-Ausgabe: 253 Seiten
  • Gleichzeitige Verwendung von Geräten: Keine Einschränkung
  • Verlag:; Auflage: 3 (19. Januar 2014)
  • Verkauf durch: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Sprache: Englisch
  • Text-to-Speech (Vorlesemodus): Aktiviert
  • X-Ray:
  • Durchschnittliche Kundenbewertung: 5.0 von 5 Sternen  Alle Rezensionen anzeigen (2 Kundenrezensionen)
  • Amazon Bestseller-Rang: #211.893 Bezahlt in Kindle-Shop (Siehe Top 100 Bezahlt in Kindle-Shop)

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5.0 von 5 Sternen Loved it! 29. Januar 2013
Von TJ
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
This novel has it all! Great characters, a lighthearted but interesting storyline, quality writing, and proof that an enjoyable read doesn't have to cost a fortune.

Very warmly recommended.
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5.0 von 5 Sternen Fun and easy read!!! 21. Juni 2012
Von Simone
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
READ THIS BOOK! It's smart, well written, entertaining, and you will NOT want to put it down!!!! Hoping that there will be a next book.
War diese Rezension für Sie hilfreich?
Die hilfreichsten Kundenrezensionen auf (beta) 4.3 von 5 Sternen  517 Rezensionen
60 von 60 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
4.0 von 5 Sternen Phone Kitten Has Claws! 21. Januar 2011
Von Nathan Burgoine - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
I am a firm believer in the fun mystery, and love it when a book makes me humiliate myself by laughing out loud in public places. Marika Christian's "Phone Kitten" is just such a book - so consider yourself warned if you're reading on the bus.

Emily is a self-proclaimed "chub" - a girl with curves who is used to being invisible to everyone around her. When her career takes a turn for the unemployed, she finds she has a talent in her voice, and joins a phone sex company as "Peyton." Peyton is freckled, wild, and takes no prisoners, and soon Emily's life seems to be turning around: her new mantra of "What Would Peyton Do?" is paying off. There's a hottie paying attention to her, her friend's torture training sessions at the gym are paying off a little, and she's good at her job - she even has some very regular customers who tell them quite a bit about their lives in between more "urgent" matters.

But when one of those customers ends up murdered, Emily finds herself tangling with some shady characters, running for her life, and maybe - just maybe - there'll be time for a little lovin' from her hottie, assuming she can stay alive, and he doesn't flip out about the day job.

Fans of Janet Evanovich and Jennifer Crusie need to grab a copy of "Phone Kitten" and dive in. Have your credit card ready.
33 von 33 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Who knew murder could be so enjoyable? 31. Januar 2011
Von Lisa S - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Kindle Edition
The best word to describe Phone Kitten is FUN! A sweet, enjoyable read with lots of laughter and surprises, Phone Kitten delivers mirth, murder and mayhem with a twist or two to make a great mystery.

Emily Winters might be new to the world of "erotic conversation", but she's a natural, and soon a whole new world opens up to her. She leaves her unassuming life behind; who knew being a phone kitten could be so much fun? When one of her best clients is murdered, Emily decides to solve the case. Will she be able to juggle her new career, her new boyfriend, and a murder?

If you are looking for a quirky endearing heroine to spend time with, then Emily is the girl for you. There is a cast of colorful characters and Ms. Christian handles the wonderful world of phone sex - which could be tricky - with humor. Fans of Janet Evanovich will love this book. If you are looking for a light hearted mystery - look no further. I'm looking forward to more Emily in the future.
36 von 37 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen From someone who hates 'chick' books- this book was a very pleasant surprise! 24. Juni 2012
Von NeverBroken - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
I was recommended this book by a friend- we are both, shall we say, acquainted with the 'phone kitten' industry. I checked out the synopsis and it seemed like every other 'chick' book that I have hated. Still, it was free, and due to my industry connections I thought I'd check it out.

I LOVED this book! It was silly, fun, exciting, suspenseful... I was really pleasantly surprised. I would highly recommend it to anyone looking for a 'fun' mystery read.

However- what I did not like, was the mini-movies you could view at the end. 'Not like' is actually a fairly tame statement, in fact I pretty much hated these- there was absolutely nothing right about them, and to me, they detracted from the story even after I had finished it and loved it.

Why? A few reasons. One- the actress who plays the main character was nothing like I would have thought from the book. I know this happens, we all have different visions in our minds; but she was actually much older and not very attractive, which is not what I got from the writing at all. Two- her portrayal of a 'phone kitten' was absurd. The way she spoke, like she was a horrible actress, obviously bored and couldn't care less- she wouldn't have lasted a month in the industry, much less done as well as it was shown in the book. Three- Showing her not only obviously bored and not caring about her job, but doing noisy things around the house at the same time- frankly it makes the whole industry look bad to those who don't know better. And it was not how she was portrayed in the book- what I took from the book was that she was a dedicated and talented Phone Actress.

So, great book- loved it! But scrap those videos please, they are horrendous and don't do anything for the story.
17 von 18 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
3.0 von 5 Sternen Hello Kitten? 18. November 2012
Von Cici - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
"Phone Kitten" is a fun, lightweight mystery, good to have on hand when you just want some entertainment. Emily is trying to make her way in the world, trying to take some college courses, while getting established in her career. She is dealing with her weight issues, insecurities, and worse, a back stabbing co-worker. After Emily was set up to fail by her 'friend', she lost her job, and had to find a new one that would give her the flexibility to continue her classes, but also pay the bills. The answer for her immediate need was to become a phone sex girl. But when one of her clients is murdered, she decides to investigate the crime herself.

For my personal reading tastes, the book was a bit ponderous and slow moving. There is a fine line between when details are necessary to set the scene, and when they prolong the action to the point of causing the reader to lose interest. I was interested because of frequent references to familiar Florida places and events, but the danger in that is inaccuracies become glaring. Some I recall include: "Howard Franklin Bridge" should be Howard Frankland Bridge; "Tampa Bay Bucks" should be Tampa Bay Bucs (short for Buccaneers); Guavaween is not the first Saturday in October, but rather the last one - close to Halloween; Quixote Key - There is a Don Quixote Key, but it is in the Florida Keys, not close to St Pete at all. But I'm forgiving this one, allowing for artistic license to create a place meeting needed criteria. This is a book of fiction, so I can more easily accept settings that aren't real. But when you are name dropping real places and events, accuracy is more important. I also understand that this may not have been the fault of the author, but rather errors made when someone was converting this to an e-book edition. Even spell check doesn't like "Frankland" and "Guavaween".

Overall, the author shows promise, and I would think she is one to watch.
9 von 10 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Emily is an extremely likable character 21. November 2012
Von Jonathon K - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Kindle Edition|Verifizierter Kauf
Phone Kitten hit the right spot with me, and to be honest, it took me awhile to figure out why. I didn't buy the sleuthing at all, and a few of Emily's actions were unrealistic (she should have listened to Dennis!), but I finally realized that the author created one of the most likable protagonists I've come across in quite some time.

Emily is a "chub," a bigger girl who has gone through life invisible to most people. She has lost 30 pounds, and guys seem to find her attractive, but she has the chub self-image and is overly concerned about her appearance. When she is fired from her job, she takes a job as a phone sex operator where her sultry and sexy voice seems to make her a perfect fit despite her lack of experience in the romantic arts. When one of her clients ends up murdered, she goes Nancy Drew to try and solve the case.

As I wrote above, I didn't buy the sleuthing. Very little of it seemed reasonable, but in the end, I didn't care. I don't think this was meant to be an accurate and realistic detective novel, and the reveal at the end broke detective fiction conventions. But as a light-hearted romp, none of that mattered.

Emily is everybody, and to me, she resonates. I am a middle-aged man, and I don't have a weight problem, yet I found myself in her. I could empathize with her, and I maybe fell a little in love with her myself. She was funny, resourceful, and full of the self-doubts that all of us face. While a unique character, I was a little reminded of Toula in the film "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." The bottom line is that I was drawn into her life and wanted more.

The phone sex was a nice little hook, although the actual phone sex was almost non-existent. This was a very tame book despite her job. I think most people have at least a passing prurient interest in the seamier side of life, hence the ratings when shows like "Taboo" cover such subjects. So it was interesting to read just how this industry works. The author's description seemed accurate to me. I have a friend who, after an accident that kept her bedridden while she was recovering, worked as a telephone tarot card reader for half a year or so, and the author's telling of the business of phone sex pretty much fell in line with that of the fortune telling, the differing end result notwithstanding.

I liked the author's wordsmithing. She was clear, crisp, and emotive in her written word. The story flowed well without gaps and slow spots. But her most important skill was in characterization. Emily was extremely well-fleshed (no pun intended), but even the other characters, especially the "good guys," were also well done. I was surprised to see how well I came to like Craig as the book developed when initially I thought he was only a minor character. Rick, Emily's love interest, also developed quite well.

The bottom line is that I really enjoyed this book, which still surprises me a bit. I enthusiastically recommend it, and I look forward to reading more by this author.
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