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Lust in Translation: The Rules of Infidelity from Tokyo to Tennessee [Englisch] [Gebundene Ausgabe]

Pamela Druckerman

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19. April 2007
An irreverent and hilarious journey around the world to examine how and why people cheat on their spouses; this global look at infidelity reveals that Americans are uniquely mixed up about being faithful.

It's an adulterous world out there. Russian husbands and wives don't believe that beach-resort flings violate their marital vows. Japanese businessmen, armed with the aphorism "If you pay, it's not cheating," flock to sex clubs where the extramarital services on offer include "getting oral sex without showering first." South Africans may be the masters of creative accounting: Pollsters there had to create separate categories for men who cheat, and men who only cheat while drunk.

In America, however, there is never a free pass when it comes to infidelity. According to our national moral compass, cheating is abominable no matter what the circumstances. But do we actually behave differently than everyone else? Pamela Druckerman, a former foreign correspondent for The Wall Street Journal, decided to delve into this incredibly taboo topic. She interviews people all over the world, from retirees in South Florida to Muslim polygamists in Indonesia; from Hasidic Jews in Brooklyn to the men who keep their mistresses in a "concubine village" outside Hong Kong.

Druckerman talks to psychologists, sex researchers, marriage counselors, and most of all, cheaters and the people they've cheated on, and concludes that Americans are the least adept at having affairs, have the most trouble enjoying them, and suffer the most in their aftermath.

Lust in Translation is a voyeuristic, statistics-packed, sometimes shocking, often hysterical, worldwide glimpse into the endlessly intriguing world of extramarital sex. It may be politically incorrect to say so, but who knew infidelity could be this fascinating?

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"[Druckerman's] finely calibrated moral compass is matched by a reporter's knack for deft, understated description....[This] thoughtful and myth-busting study of infidelity deserves to be widely translated and read."
-The Economist

"A witty, engaging exploration of comparative infidelity. . . . Undeniably alluring."
-The New York Observer

"Colorfully told. . . . Entertaining."
-The New York Times

"[Druckerman's] finely calibrated moral compass is matched by a reporter's knack for deft, understated description."
-The Economist

-- Dieser Text bezieht sich auf eine andere Ausgabe: Taschenbuch .

Über den Autor und weitere Mitwirkende

Pamela Druckerman is a former staff reporter for The Wall Street Journal. She has a Master's in International Affairs from Columbia University, and has reported from S‹o Paulo, Buenos Aires, Jerusalem, Paris and New York. She lives in Paris.

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Die hilfreichsten Kundenrezensionen auf (beta) 3.8 von 5 Sternen  26 Rezensionen
23 von 26 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Unique & humorous perspective on cultural differences 30. Juni 2007
Von Mitchell Wander - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
I decided to buy a copy of "Lust in Translation" by Pamela Druckerman because way back when (mid 1980s), Pamela and I were US House of Representatives pages together. Other than an occasional email contact, I had not directly heard much from Pamela. I had read several of her Wall Street Journal articles over the years.

As someone who thoroughly enjoys reading about other cultures and people, this book fit my occasional non-fiction reading habits. I wasn't looking for anything "heavy" - as in, full of facts, figures, dates, or history. And, I certainly wanted to stay away from anything that seemed academic or dry.

It's fair to say that if you're looking for relatively creative non-fiction spanning several cultures that are not frequently bunched together or compared (including Hasidic Jews, French, and Chinese), you'll find it hard to put down this book.

In my opinion, Druckerman's writing style mirrors what you would expect from a former Wall Street Journal reporter. She mixes interviews, statistics, and commentary in a nearly seamless manner. In a sense, it's a collection of long articles - each relating to a different culture's practices and perspectives relating to infidelity.

There are many funny tidbits (using words you usually don't see in serious non-fiction) about how each culture covered refers to affairs in their language - often using slang terms. I laughed out loud a few times.

To me, the best contribution of the book is comparing the stereotypes regarding infidelity for each culture to how it is currently viewed within the culture. I was left surprised that anyone would share some of the details described in the book - even on an anonymous basis.

My overall conclusion is that this book falls into the category of "Truth is stranger than fiction." The way Druckerman handles this topic, it's possibly more funny than fiction, too.
24 von 28 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Shrinking things down to size... 28. Mai 2007
Von Win Dixie - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
As a psychotherapist, I must say that this book shares a clear perspective on cheating which is not only useful for professional therapists dealing with issues of infidelity, it is at once relevant and useful for my clients as well. Taking the approach from a non-religious and non-moral majority stance allows this painful yet fascinating topic to be unpacked in a way that gives us a sense that what is happening in these relationships, OUR relationships, is a quiet storm crying out for love and the absence of pain. We must grow together in relationships with communication as our navigational system, rather than rely on satisfying our emotional holes with sexual silly putty. This book should be on every therapists shelf and anyone in a relationship worth saving.
10 von 10 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen EXCELLENT book! 23. Juli 2007
Von Amazon Customer - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
As an American who lived in Japan for several years, I believe that Ms. Druckerman's observations of the culture surrounding marriage, courtship, and extra-marital affairs in Japan are very accurate. I also enjoyed reading the rest of the book, and found it to be well-researched, well-analyzed, and well-written. This book does not aim to be a self-help book; rather, it is more of a sociological perspective on a universal issue. The book's description of cultural differences and personal perspectives regarding infidelity are fascinating. Overall, the book is interesting and enjoyable to read, and I highly recommend it.
35 von 46 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
3.0 von 5 Sternen Better zine piece than a book 23. April 2007
Von Michael P. Maslanka - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
This is an interesting topic---how infidelity is looked at around the world. But, this book is more of a paded magazine piece than anything else. There are some stats and then the author's travelogue of spending a few days in one country and a few days in another.Here is the Big Idea: people in poor countries cheat a lot, those in wealthy ones(including France), very little;we in the USA get worked up over cheating a lot, while our wealthy sisters(including France)see lies as part of life; in Russia, there is a ton of cheating going on because there are lots of men, few women, with men exploiting the difference. The wrap up chapter and the one on Russia are very good, as is the stuff on poverty/wealth and cheating. But,the book could have stopped there and been twice as good.
7 von 9 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
4.0 von 5 Sternen A guide for the perplexed? 11. Juni 2007
Von A. Shaviv - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
"Thinking of the unthinkable" -- be it a nuclear disaster or personal tragedy -- is never an easy lot. Exploring, unearthing and writing publically about the "unthinkable" is even more uncomfortable. Infidelity is certainly an issue belonging to the "unthinkable" in our contemporary environment, yet this author managed to explore it in a style that is witty, smart, candid and lucid. Her sense of humor and delicate, tactfull hand helps make reading a delightful and enriching experience, avoiding pitfalls that could cause embarrassment to the reader ( and the writer, of course.)

As one whose work takes him across the glob, I recognized the ring of authentnicity in the chapters dealing with societies that I know. Druckerman's observations deciphered for me some of the behavioral characteristics that I witnessed but did not fathom in societies that I visited. A great reading for anyone who travels the world -- perhaps a must reading for international corporation staff or UN-type personnel. It is a "guide for the perplexed"-cum-travel guide for the uncharted roads of infidelity.
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