- Gebundene Ausgabe: 320 Seiten
- Verlag: Crown Business; Auflage: 1 (10. August 2010)
- Sprache: Englisch
- ISBN-10: 0307589137
- ISBN-13: 978-0307589132
- Größe und/oder Gewicht: 21,7 x 14,2 x 2,8 cm
- Durchschnittliche Kundenbewertung: 5.0 von 5 Sternen Alle Rezensionen anzeigen (1 Kundenrezension)
- Amazon Bestseller-Rang: Nr. 781.118 in Englische Bücher (Siehe Top 100 in Englische Bücher)
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It's Not Just Who You Know
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Produktbeschreibungen
Pressestimmen
“a valuable, reader-friendly guidebook for both business and personal living”
—Fort Worth Star-Telegram
"Tommy masterfully illustrates case by case, person by person, that we're all in this together."
--Woody Johnson, owner of the New York Jets
—Fort Worth Star-Telegram
"Tommy masterfully illustrates case by case, person by person, that we're all in this together."
--Woody Johnson, owner of the New York Jets
Kurzbeschreibung
In It’s Not Just Who You Know, Tommy Spaulding—the former CEO of Up With People—has written the new How to Win Friends and Influence People for the twenty-fist century. Success—in business and in life—is all about relationships. In this powerful guide to reaching out to others, Spaulding takes Dale Carnegie’s classic philosophy to the next level—how to create lasting relationships that go well beyond mere superficial contacts and “second floor” relationships.
Tommy Spaulding learned at a very young age that he was not destined to be an academic star. He may have gotten a 4.0, but only if he added his high school and college GPAs together. The reason he found academics so challenging, he discovered later, is that Tommy is dyslexic. But his dyslexia didn’t hold him back—in fact, it helped him to develop the talents he did have. For Tommy is a natural leader; he realized early on that he had a unique ability to connect with others, whatever their age or background. As a teenager, he was given a copy of How to Win Friends and Influence People by his father, and it quickly became his bible. He became a national finalist for the DECA Entrepreneurial Business competition in high school, and ran successfully for senior class president. He went on to become the CEO of Up With People, one of the largest nonprofit international leadership organizations in the world.
At every step, Tommy learned that the secret to getting ahead was reaching out for the support and insight and influence of others. None of us achieve great success alone. We need the help of other people.
In this candid, revealing book, Tommy expands upon the principles that Dale Carnegie outlined 75 years ago, and shows us how to take them one step further to accomplish the impossible in our lives and careers. To invite others to be genuine partners in our lives and success, Tommy explains, you have to first be interested in other people. It’s not just who you know, or what they can do for you, but what you can do for them. Motives matter. Establishing a deeper connection is about authenticity, not manipulation. Reciprocity, not selfishness. Every relationship is a two-way street; we never know when a chance encounter can change the direction of our life.
In the bestselling tradition of Dale Carnegie’s classic, It’s Not Just Who You Know shows how each and every one of us can use the power of netgiving—of helping others—to expand our world and achieve our goals, and make a difference in our job, our career, and our community.
Tommy Spaulding learned at a very young age that he was not destined to be an academic star. He may have gotten a 4.0, but only if he added his high school and college GPAs together. The reason he found academics so challenging, he discovered later, is that Tommy is dyslexic. But his dyslexia didn’t hold him back—in fact, it helped him to develop the talents he did have. For Tommy is a natural leader; he realized early on that he had a unique ability to connect with others, whatever their age or background. As a teenager, he was given a copy of How to Win Friends and Influence People by his father, and it quickly became his bible. He became a national finalist for the DECA Entrepreneurial Business competition in high school, and ran successfully for senior class president. He went on to become the CEO of Up With People, one of the largest nonprofit international leadership organizations in the world.
At every step, Tommy learned that the secret to getting ahead was reaching out for the support and insight and influence of others. None of us achieve great success alone. We need the help of other people.
In this candid, revealing book, Tommy expands upon the principles that Dale Carnegie outlined 75 years ago, and shows us how to take them one step further to accomplish the impossible in our lives and careers. To invite others to be genuine partners in our lives and success, Tommy explains, you have to first be interested in other people. It’s not just who you know, or what they can do for you, but what you can do for them. Motives matter. Establishing a deeper connection is about authenticity, not manipulation. Reciprocity, not selfishness. Every relationship is a two-way street; we never know when a chance encounter can change the direction of our life.
In the bestselling tradition of Dale Carnegie’s classic, It’s Not Just Who You Know shows how each and every one of us can use the power of netgiving—of helping others—to expand our world and achieve our goals, and make a difference in our job, our career, and our community.
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Buchdeckel | Copyright | Inhaltsverzeichnis | Auszug | Stichwortverzeichnis
Buchdeckel | Copyright | Inhaltsverzeichnis | Auszug | Stichwortverzeichnis
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A Warm-Hearted Memoir about the Virtues and Benefits of Drawing Closer to Others in Loving Ways
8. September 2010
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
"We have spoken openly to you, our heart is wide open." -- 2 Corinthians 6:11 (NKJV)
Tommy Spaulding comes naturally by his interest in other people. He's outgoing. He likes to meet people. He has many good purposes in mind. In the process of following his heart in drawing closer to others, he has learned that it's not enough to have acquaintances, or close associates, or even friends. The most satisfying relationships comes from being more concerned about doing something good for others more than accomplishing any other purpose.
In this heart-warming memoir, Mr. Spaulding describes the way we relate to one another in terms of five floors and encourages you to move onto the higher floors:
1. First floor: transactional connections (People do things for one another because it's their job.)
2. Second floor: includes casual relationships where you know people somewhat, but you aren't friends.
3. Third floor: peers working toward common goals, but the personal connection is pretty superficial.
4. Fourth floor: connections beyond getting the job or task done (mentors, good friends, close colleagues, and people you care about beyond your family).
5. Fifth floor (penthouse): shared values, openness, candor, vulnerability, and focus on the other person's needs (your closest and most intimate relationships)
While Mr. Spaulding suffered a lot from dyslexia in his youth, that disorder certainly didn't affect his story-telling ability or his heart. For those who have never considered that those they engage with every day can be people who they are open and trusting with, this book will be an eye opener.
Some people might be tempted to characterize this book as being about advanced networking, (and there's certainly an element of how to develop connections with the rich and powerful) but the book's real message is about getting more out of life than just meeting your sales quota this month. I was pleased to see that Mr. Spaulding was candid in explaining that not everyone you trust will be worthy of your trust. His advice is to keep loving and being good to others anyway.
I think he has written a good book for those who want to be civic leaders. If you know someone who aspires to such a role, do the person a favor and share a copy of this book with him or her.
Tommy Spaulding comes naturally by his interest in other people. He's outgoing. He likes to meet people. He has many good purposes in mind. In the process of following his heart in drawing closer to others, he has learned that it's not enough to have acquaintances, or close associates, or even friends. The most satisfying relationships comes from being more concerned about doing something good for others more than accomplishing any other purpose.
In this heart-warming memoir, Mr. Spaulding describes the way we relate to one another in terms of five floors and encourages you to move onto the higher floors:
1. First floor: transactional connections (People do things for one another because it's their job.)
2. Second floor: includes casual relationships where you know people somewhat, but you aren't friends.
3. Third floor: peers working toward common goals, but the personal connection is pretty superficial.
4. Fourth floor: connections beyond getting the job or task done (mentors, good friends, close colleagues, and people you care about beyond your family).
5. Fifth floor (penthouse): shared values, openness, candor, vulnerability, and focus on the other person's needs (your closest and most intimate relationships)
While Mr. Spaulding suffered a lot from dyslexia in his youth, that disorder certainly didn't affect his story-telling ability or his heart. For those who have never considered that those they engage with every day can be people who they are open and trusting with, this book will be an eye opener.
Some people might be tempted to characterize this book as being about advanced networking, (and there's certainly an element of how to develop connections with the rich and powerful) but the book's real message is about getting more out of life than just meeting your sales quota this month. I was pleased to see that Mr. Spaulding was candid in explaining that not everyone you trust will be worthy of your trust. His advice is to keep loving and being good to others anyway.
I think he has written a good book for those who want to be civic leaders. If you know someone who aspires to such a role, do the person a favor and share a copy of this book with him or her.
Die hilfreichsten Kundenrezensionen auf Amazon.com (beta)
Amazon.com:
27 Rezensionen
49 von 64 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
Standard motivational formula / All reviews here look like a marketing program for the book.
5. Oktober 2010
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
All 17 reviews here are very similar in style and content. They don't so much review the book as promote it very energetically. One gets the sense that they were prepared as part of a marketing program. The reviews often mention highlights of the book. That looks like "teasers" to me. They also include many exhortations to buy the book - the old marketing "call to action" staple. And an unusually high percentage of readers found the reviews helpful. Hmmm...
I have extracted below a list of some phrases taken from the headers, first and last sentences only, at least one from each review. Note the excessive use of exclamation marks, and the extensive use of power words generally, and emotional ones especially. Use this list from these reviews for your own marketing - it's a good one: inspire, success, meaning, purpose, relationship, children, leader, community, heart, aspire, incredible, grateful, wonderful, genuine, power, positive, love, enjoy, invest, impact, excellent. They recur frequently in various forms and contexts - classic marketing.
Ok, so here's my review of the book:
Spaulding uses his own life experiences to describe the importance of relationships, and then elaborates on how you should apply them in your life. The book follows the classic motivational/self-help writer/speaker formula: catchy phrases, personalization to make advice come alive, loads of emotive power words, lots of promises of transformation, and the obligatory formula of the ilk "common-sense plus everyday-thing equals dramatic-effect."
The sheer number of players and the financial success of inspirational/motivational writer/speakers proves that there is a market for this style, so I must assume that many people love it and must be suitably inspired. If that's you, this book fills out the template really well so you're sure to get your money's worth.
For the rest of us, it's just basic psychology. We all want to be better as people, in relationships, financially, or whatever. So, promise us that. Then, make it really readable and very human, so that we can relate. Inspire us with tales of people overcoming adversity. Gain credibility by telling us how bad it was for you and that if the five simple steps in the book worked for you, imagine what they could do for me? And finally keep it really everyday simple. No analysis, no theories, no academics, no long words, no hypothesis testing. Just personal testimony and lots of really simple power words. Oh, and no hard work required, no discipline, no sacrifice, no setbacks, not much effort at all. The author has been through all that for you. Just follow the elementary formula described in the book, and you will have a powerful and dynamic transformation in your life. (I'm not knocking Spaulding, just describing how the genre works.)
Here my further skepticism. Spaulding mentions that he is dyslexic, which made him embarrassed and appear to be stupid. It is a terrible affliction and I have much sympathy. I realize that it must be very embarrassing and that it most certainly does not mean you're stupid (full credit to him for his pre-writer business success, and for his two Master's degrees - great accomplishments, especially with dyslexia.) But he says this was only diagnosed when he was 40. Really? The diagnosis has been around for a very long time. How was this missed?
It is also apparent from the book that he is a very likable, easy, friendly individual. He is also obviously a born leader and a natural public speaker. All credit to him, and what a blessing to have those talents to offset his learning difficulties. But is the implication that I might be like him if I follow the formula in his book? My cynicism of this genre aside, all he is doing is describing his talents. I too have talents but, even if I described them to you in a highly motivational style, I know you won't become like me.
Thanks to a friend for gifting me this book (one of the exhortations contained therein, btw), and I paid you the respect of reading it, but can I go and get on with Real Life now, please?
Here the extracts mentioned above:
Inspiring & Thought Provoking - Oh my goodness did this book make me think...it is thought provoking and inspiring ... and how you can be a better person and still be successful.
...giving meaning and purpose to what you do.
Relationships are truly measured by more than what you get out of them...
A Must Read for All Ages!! - Tommy Spaulding's, "It's Not Just Who You Know" is an inspiring and insightful look ... share with your children and students as this will help them develop into true Leaders in their communities.
A Warm-Hearted Memoir about the Virtues and Benefits...- If you know someone who aspires to such a role, do the person a favor and share a copy of this book with him or her.
An incredible book; an incredible person; and an incredible message.
so good it earned my first review ever!! - If you are at all on the fence about acquiring a copy of Tommy Spaulding's book, get over the fence! ... I am grateful to have the opportunity to spend time with such a wonderful read!!
Must Read for all - this is the best book I have read in years...READ THIS BOOK. Tommy Spaulding is changing the world -- one relationship at a time.
Tommy is the genuine article, the real deal and you will thank yourself for investing a few hours of your time, reading his book.
A must read and not just for business people!
Examine the power of "netgiving" versus networking - the positive impact they have on your professional and personal life. The unlikely stroke of luck ... You will never look at a chance meeting or formal introduction in the same way after reading this book
I love Tommy's book - Successful relationships are a critical fuel that fulfills people's lives ... create more successful business relationships. Tommy teaches you how.
You will love this book! - This book captures the importance of being authentic ... A business oriented book you will enjoy reading, and gain a great deal from!
This hits it on the button...This is a must read for all and one that will help to make the world a better place. Bravo!
Read and learn from him! - The investment in this book will seem small in comparison to the investment you will make in yourself ... There are so many aha moments from this book that can impact you and more importantly
Excellent Read... A Home Run - This book is great for anyone interested in learning about...success ... This book has so many lessons in it, you might have to read it twice!
A Must Read...Excellent Book...Incredible, Inspirational Challenge - I have read this book and must say that I have been inspired and challenged...This is a must read that I believe will be a classic that is re-read often. I look forward to see the many ways that Tommy Spaulding's message will impact our culture! (This one got a comment saying the review looked fake. The author took the opportunity to promote Spaulding's speaking tour. Hmmmm...)
I have extracted below a list of some phrases taken from the headers, first and last sentences only, at least one from each review. Note the excessive use of exclamation marks, and the extensive use of power words generally, and emotional ones especially. Use this list from these reviews for your own marketing - it's a good one: inspire, success, meaning, purpose, relationship, children, leader, community, heart, aspire, incredible, grateful, wonderful, genuine, power, positive, love, enjoy, invest, impact, excellent. They recur frequently in various forms and contexts - classic marketing.
Ok, so here's my review of the book:
Spaulding uses his own life experiences to describe the importance of relationships, and then elaborates on how you should apply them in your life. The book follows the classic motivational/self-help writer/speaker formula: catchy phrases, personalization to make advice come alive, loads of emotive power words, lots of promises of transformation, and the obligatory formula of the ilk "common-sense plus everyday-thing equals dramatic-effect."
The sheer number of players and the financial success of inspirational/motivational writer/speakers proves that there is a market for this style, so I must assume that many people love it and must be suitably inspired. If that's you, this book fills out the template really well so you're sure to get your money's worth.
For the rest of us, it's just basic psychology. We all want to be better as people, in relationships, financially, or whatever. So, promise us that. Then, make it really readable and very human, so that we can relate. Inspire us with tales of people overcoming adversity. Gain credibility by telling us how bad it was for you and that if the five simple steps in the book worked for you, imagine what they could do for me? And finally keep it really everyday simple. No analysis, no theories, no academics, no long words, no hypothesis testing. Just personal testimony and lots of really simple power words. Oh, and no hard work required, no discipline, no sacrifice, no setbacks, not much effort at all. The author has been through all that for you. Just follow the elementary formula described in the book, and you will have a powerful and dynamic transformation in your life. (I'm not knocking Spaulding, just describing how the genre works.)
Here my further skepticism. Spaulding mentions that he is dyslexic, which made him embarrassed and appear to be stupid. It is a terrible affliction and I have much sympathy. I realize that it must be very embarrassing and that it most certainly does not mean you're stupid (full credit to him for his pre-writer business success, and for his two Master's degrees - great accomplishments, especially with dyslexia.) But he says this was only diagnosed when he was 40. Really? The diagnosis has been around for a very long time. How was this missed?
It is also apparent from the book that he is a very likable, easy, friendly individual. He is also obviously a born leader and a natural public speaker. All credit to him, and what a blessing to have those talents to offset his learning difficulties. But is the implication that I might be like him if I follow the formula in his book? My cynicism of this genre aside, all he is doing is describing his talents. I too have talents but, even if I described them to you in a highly motivational style, I know you won't become like me.
Thanks to a friend for gifting me this book (one of the exhortations contained therein, btw), and I paid you the respect of reading it, but can I go and get on with Real Life now, please?
Here the extracts mentioned above:
Inspiring & Thought Provoking - Oh my goodness did this book make me think...it is thought provoking and inspiring ... and how you can be a better person and still be successful.
...giving meaning and purpose to what you do.
Relationships are truly measured by more than what you get out of them...
A Must Read for All Ages!! - Tommy Spaulding's, "It's Not Just Who You Know" is an inspiring and insightful look ... share with your children and students as this will help them develop into true Leaders in their communities.
A Warm-Hearted Memoir about the Virtues and Benefits...- If you know someone who aspires to such a role, do the person a favor and share a copy of this book with him or her.
An incredible book; an incredible person; and an incredible message.
so good it earned my first review ever!! - If you are at all on the fence about acquiring a copy of Tommy Spaulding's book, get over the fence! ... I am grateful to have the opportunity to spend time with such a wonderful read!!
Must Read for all - this is the best book I have read in years...READ THIS BOOK. Tommy Spaulding is changing the world -- one relationship at a time.
Tommy is the genuine article, the real deal and you will thank yourself for investing a few hours of your time, reading his book.
A must read and not just for business people!
Examine the power of "netgiving" versus networking - the positive impact they have on your professional and personal life. The unlikely stroke of luck ... You will never look at a chance meeting or formal introduction in the same way after reading this book
I love Tommy's book - Successful relationships are a critical fuel that fulfills people's lives ... create more successful business relationships. Tommy teaches you how.
You will love this book! - This book captures the importance of being authentic ... A business oriented book you will enjoy reading, and gain a great deal from!
This hits it on the button...This is a must read for all and one that will help to make the world a better place. Bravo!
Read and learn from him! - The investment in this book will seem small in comparison to the investment you will make in yourself ... There are so many aha moments from this book that can impact you and more importantly
Excellent Read... A Home Run - This book is great for anyone interested in learning about...success ... This book has so many lessons in it, you might have to read it twice!
A Must Read...Excellent Book...Incredible, Inspirational Challenge - I have read this book and must say that I have been inspired and challenged...This is a must read that I believe will be a classic that is re-read often. I look forward to see the many ways that Tommy Spaulding's message will impact our culture! (This one got a comment saying the review looked fake. The author took the opportunity to promote Spaulding's speaking tour. Hmmmm...)
6 von 7 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
More 'Why' Than 'How'
18. Oktober 2010
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
A better title might be "Nice Guys Don't Finish Last."
In this very enjoyable, feel-good read, Spaulding describes how being a nice guy - interested in others, listening with respect to people, helping out others, etc. - has given him a great life. His book is part memoir, part inspiring story and part justification for building deeper and more meaningful professional relationships.
Other reviewers (advocates, maybe?) have described the book well so I won't. Here's what they didn't say but you should know:
The book is more high level than how-to. The suggestions for ways anyone can take relationships to level five - the penthouse - are based on his experiences and personality. They worked well for him but might not fit too many others.
This guy takes extroversion to new levels - it's extroversion on steroids. He says anyone can learn to do what he does but just reading about his activities made me want to spend more time alone. And I score above average on extroversion!
While his stories of how relationships changed his life were very moving and convincing, he focuses only on the positive relationships. I would have benefited more from hearing how he dealt with what he calls cancer in relationships - jealousy, selfishness and insecurities - as well as people who are very critical or don't share your values.
Maybe that will be Volume 2.
In this very enjoyable, feel-good read, Spaulding describes how being a nice guy - interested in others, listening with respect to people, helping out others, etc. - has given him a great life. His book is part memoir, part inspiring story and part justification for building deeper and more meaningful professional relationships.
Other reviewers (advocates, maybe?) have described the book well so I won't. Here's what they didn't say but you should know:
The book is more high level than how-to. The suggestions for ways anyone can take relationships to level five - the penthouse - are based on his experiences and personality. They worked well for him but might not fit too many others.
This guy takes extroversion to new levels - it's extroversion on steroids. He says anyone can learn to do what he does but just reading about his activities made me want to spend more time alone. And I score above average on extroversion!
While his stories of how relationships changed his life were very moving and convincing, he focuses only on the positive relationships. I would have benefited more from hearing how he dealt with what he calls cancer in relationships - jealousy, selfishness and insecurities - as well as people who are very critical or don't share your values.
Maybe that will be Volume 2.
I highly recommend this book
6. Juni 2011
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
I'm on my 3rd reading of this book. There are so many lessons I'm learning. I'm so inspired to follow through with volunteering that I've been putting off....despite how much I love to do volunteer work. It's just a matter of searching for the right fit to focus my drive...if you're searching too....I recommend giving this book a try, too.
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