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It's Always Personal: Navigating Emotion in the New Workplace [Englisch] [Taschenbuch]

Anne Kreamer

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1. Januar 2013
An innovative study of gender, emotion, and power, It’s Always Personal is an essential companion for everyone navigating the challenges of the contemporary workplace.
How often have we heard “It’s nothing against you, it’s not personal—it’s just business”? But in fact, at work it’s never just business—it’s always personal. In this groundbreaking book, journalist and former corporate executive Anne Kreamer shows us how to get rational about our emotions, and provides the necessary new tools to flourish in an emotionally charged workplace. Combining the latest information on the intricacies of the human brain, candid stories from employees, and the surprising results of two national surveys, It’s Always Personal offers
• a step-by-step guide for identifying your emotional type: Spouter, Accepter, Believer, or Solver
• Emotion Management Toolkits that outline strategies to cope with specific emotionally challenging situations
• vital facts that will help you understand—and handle—the six main emotional flashpoints: anger, fear, anxiety, empathy, joy, and crying
• an exploration of how men and women deal with emotions differently
“A stimulating read bolstered by snippets of some of the best recent work on emotional intelligence and the science of happiness.”—The Wall Street Journal
“So what should be the rules and boundaries for showing how you feel while you work? That’s a question asked and answered in Anne Kreamer’s fascinating book . . . [a] look at an issue that rarely gets discussed.”—The Washington Post
“Finally, someone is willing to unpack the morass of anger, anxiety, sadness, and joy that drives the workday. . . . [Kreamer] has hit the ‘It’s about time!’ button.”—Elle
“[A] lively, well-researched exploration of emotions on the job.”—
“Explores how to be true to your ‘emotional flashpoints—anger, fear, anxiety, empathy, happiness and crying’—without sabotaging your career.”—The New York Times Book Review


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Praise for It's Always Personal:

“Throughout this heartfelt book, Ms. Kreamer comes down on the side of accepting and expressing one’s authentic feelings, though in sensible and constructive ways. “It’s Always Personal” argues that greater emotional openness could lend vitality to American business, and it urges both men and women to ‘bring their full, true selves to the game.’ It’s a stimulating read bolstered by snippets of some of the best recent work on emotional intelligence and the science of happiness.”
—Clare McHugh, The Wall Street Journal

"It's Always Personal will transform the way you look at office culture and work relationships.  In an insightful analysis packed with research, evidence, and real-life examples, Kreamer demonstrates why emotion matters so much in the workplace--and, with practical advice, she identifies ways to be happier and more effective at work." 
--Gretchen Rubin, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Happiness Project
"This will be one of the most fascinating and useful books you'll ever read.  In this groundbreaking study, Anne Kreamer looks at emotion in the workplace through first-hand experiences, scientific research, and empirical data.  What's the role of anger, fear empathy, anxiety and tears?  This book explains them in ways that will make you a better worker, boss and human being." 
--Walter Isaacson, President and CEO, The Aspen Institute and former CEO of CNN   
"It's Always Personal made me want to stand up and cheer!  I love this book.  And every person who has ever been a boss or an employee needs to read it.  Superb reading and highly practical!" 
--Christiane Northrup, M.D., New York Times bestselling author of Women's Bodies,Women's Wisdom and The Wisdom of Menopause

“A magnificent book, deeply researched, fun to read.  Destined to become a classic in the field of women and work.”
--Dr. Louann Brizendine, New York Times bestselling author of The Female Brain

"Anne Kreamer’s fascinating the next pick for the Color of Money Book Club.  To better manage your feelings, Kreamer recommends building an emotion-management toolkit... So, you know what? Cry if you want to. Just use the suggestions and techniques Kreamer outlines to make sure your weeping doesn’t get in the way of your work." 
The Washington Post

 “Kreamer makes a solid case for her philosophy in the most compelling way possible, by appealing to rationality and the bottom line, resulting in an extremely readable, well-reasoned volume that will leave readers with a heightened emotional intelligence of their own, more confidence and rationality about their emotions, and an ability to take that knowledge to the office.”
—Publisher’s Weekly Review

“Big girls do cry—and yell—at work, according to this lively, well-researched exploration of emotions on the job.”
O, The Oprah Magazine
“…what makes Kreamer’s book transcend Who Moved My Cheese-yness is the tension that thrums beneath her ex-executive optimism…and also
her own still-palpable disappointment in the corporate sphere.”
Elle Magazine

Über den Autor und weitere Mitwirkende

Anne Kreamer is the author of Going Gray:What I Learned about Beauty, Sex, Work, Motherhood, Authenticity and Everything Else that Really Matters, a former executive vice president and worldwide creative director of Nickelodeon, part of the founding team of SPY magazine, and a onetime columnist for both Fast Company and Martha Stewart Living. Her work has appeared in Time, Real Simple, Travel & Leisure, and More. She graduated from Harvard College and lives in Brooklyn with her husband, the writer Kurt Andersen.

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22 von 24 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Melting Down at Work? 29. März 2011
Von CMC Los Angeles - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe|Verifizierter Kauf
"It's Always Personal" (Random House, March 2011), Anne Kreamer's newest book, gets to the heart of our emotional lives in the workplace. It's a fascinating account of the tears and fears most of us struggle to suppress when we're in the office. As a former corporate executive and someone who now coaches business leaders, I understand this landscape well. Kreamer has meticulously researched her subject, includes real-life examples (in full disclosure, one of those examples belongs to me), and further provides Emotional Toolkits with each chapter, ideas and strategies for managing our emotions at work.

Kreamer opens the book with her own experience as a senior executive at MTV Networks, a division of Viacom run by the mercurial Sumner Redstone. She paints the picture of a triumphant deal and celebration with her colleagues after months of labor when an unexpected phone call arrives from Redstone. Could it be congratulations for a job well done? It wasn't to be. The Viacom Chairman reamed her from bow to stern because the deal announcement had not created an up tick in the stock price. She was in a word, devastated.

As Kreamer makes clear, we can't we have a conversation about emotions in the workplace without raising the issue of gender. She asks a provocative question, "Have you ever cried at work?" It's the inquiry she made of me during her early days of research and one she posed to many others in her pursuit of understanding what happens to our emotional selves when we cross the office threshold. In answer to her question, I have certainly wanted to cry at work but with the exception of some prodigious "welling up", have never done so. I believed then (and a part of me still does) that it was not allowed, that I would lose credibility in the doing. And therein lies the rub. Kreamer explores the issue of gender in the workplace from both an emotional and neurological point of view. Women are in fact, wired differently, she states. This is not to recreate the debacle of Larry Summers and the women in the Harvard engineering department. It is to say, as Kreamer illustrates, women who have succeeded in getting that corner office, have often done so at the expense of their own physiological and emotional makeup, shortchanging, sometimes short circuiting themselves in the process.

In order to lend some heft to what Kreamer was seeing in her interviews, she enlisted the expertise of J. Walter Thompson, a global ad agency, and specifically their Brand Intelligence Department. An investigation was launched that revealed four different emotional profiles, based on the WEEP typology created by Kreamer and the JWT team. To take the survey go to [...] The emotional types, "Spouters", "Solvers", "Accepters" and "Believers", are often corollary to the corporate culture in which we thrive (or oppositional in those we do not). Most of us, like Kreamer herself, have a toe in more than one type.

Critical to the topic is the seminal work of Daniel Goleman. Emotional Intelligence became the buzz word of the late 90's and finally gave language and power to intuitive intelligence, something that Kreamer says is more prevalent among women than men. While she is careful to state that Goleman made no distinction between men and women in his work, she does however cite advances in neuroscience made possible through fMRI technology. The ability of science to watch a live brain while is it registering various stimuli has provided hard proof to the differences in male and female brains, and the wisdom offered over the last four decades by social psychologists. Our behavior and specifically our decision making is an emotional process, a useful and perhaps alarming data point for those who still believe that logic is king.

Most psychologists would agree that resilience is the single most important attribute in emotionally healthy people. This supports the old adage that it's not what happens to us that is important, but rather what we do with what happens to us that is. Kreamer offers solid strategies for improving emotional equilibrium and resilience, the core of which seems to be remaining attentive to one's emotional state. This attention allows us to scan for emotional triggers and even physical precursors, such as hunger or fatigue. This kind of self-awareness, coupled with the willingness for men and women to express a more full range of emotions at work, might head off work place implosions - and even lead to an environment where both genders can operate in a "tag-team model", leveraging the gifts and hardwiring of each.

"It's Always Personal" is a smart book and useful for anyone (male or female) who either leads a team or is part of one. Whether in business, non-profit or volunteering in the community, we are all in the people business. Read this book! You'll be glad you did.
11 von 11 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen MAKING SENSE OUT OF EMOTIONS 13. April 2011
Von D. F. Morin - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe|Verifizierter Kauf
I could neither read IT'S ALWAYS PERSONAL fast enough because it is so compelling, nor slowly enough, so much did I want to memorize it -- all 234-information-packed thought-provoking pages. No sentence is a waste. And I didn't want to put it down - because I was reading about me, and you and our emotions in the context of the massive amount of research that Anne Kreamer has culled from myriad authoritative sources. She thought about this material, interpreted it and put it together so deftly, I found tears running down my face halfway through the book, a book that could change your life. At the least it will make you feel less alone if you ever think you screwed up emotion-wise on the job or elsewhere. It will help you better understand yourself, your emotions and those of others in the workplace, which -- Kreamer notes - is increasingly everywhere, because of the mobile communications boom. In fact, Kreamer, herself says, she was relieved to learn that she "was probably born tense." She also writes about emotion management and the differences between how men and women are wired with a refreshing and calm voice and an oeuvre that wakes you up with surprise after surprise. I hope she writes a lot more books.
7 von 9 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen ...I scribbled in the margins, I underlined and highlighted. I couldn't put this book down. 18. April 2011
Von robin m west - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe|Verifizierter Kauf
I have never been compelled to write a book review, but Anne Kreamer's "It's Always Personal" gave so much to me that I want to give back to her. I feel, too, that I owe it to anyone like me, male or female, manager or "managed", who is navigating the personalities of the present-day workplace, to tell them about this remarkable book. Indeed, I take this one very personally...

The new workplace is a far cry--maybe even a good cry--from that of "Working Girl". It is an emotionally-charged arena where one's best intentions and well-laid plans often collide with unexpected and derailing passions. In the first pages of "It's Always Personal", Anne Kreamer draws you right into this new dynamic. She describes her own experience years ago as a high-ranking executive at Nickelodeon. I don't want to give away the particulars, but suffice it to say that you can feel the range of emotions that Ms. Kreamer felt; you can identify fully with her situation. It is the frustration of almost simultaneous euphoria and agony, and achievement and humiliation. It is as if you've trained and competed hard in a high-stakes athletic championship, and when it's over and you think you've won, you find out that the rules have entirely changed. With Ms. Kreamer's help, you won't likely find yourself unprepared for such a circumstance. She teaches you how to channel and manage emotions, part and parcel of today's workplace environment, and turn them into healthy and effective tools. Blurred vision turns into clear, productive vision.

After the opening pages hook you, the rest of "It's Always Personal" doesn't let you down. Candid and revealing real-life experiences of other professionals are spread throughout the book, interspersed with national surveys and scientific data. For a book so dense with information, "It's Always Personal" is extremely well-organized. As soon as I would think Ms. Kreamer forgot to mention or consider certain relevant issues, the discussion would wind up being addressed in the following pages. "Come on", a reader of this review might respond, "A how-to book about emotions in the workplace is a page turner!?" Yes it is. It is even fun. I "aha"-ed, I "uh-huh"-ed, I scribbled in the margins, I underlined and highlighted. I couldn't put this book down. By the time I finished "It's Always Personal", my life at work started to change. I found subtle differences in my behavior, my observations, and my reactions in the office. I plan to reread this book often, and to have my colleagues do the same.
3 von 3 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen How to feel better in one's work - world 22. Juni 2011
Von Shalom Freedman - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe
This is a pioneering work, one which aims to look at the emotional life of people in the workplace and help them understand how to better thrive at work. The story begins with the author's having taken a terrible dressing down from her boss after she thought she had made a major accomplishment. Her reaction was tears, and she began to wonder about why and how people reacted to emotional situations in work. Her findings are often surprising. It is not surprising that a larger percentage of women cry at work, but it is surprising that those tears receive more sympathetic responses from Men than from Women. It is not surprising that the crying may come wherever the person is in the work heirarchy but it is surprising that that crying is fairly equally distributed throughout the heirachy. But it is not only tears, but the whole range of emotional life from Fear to anger, anxiety, and on the other side Joy and happiness which are considered. Kreamer hopes this book will be of help to working folks, and she makes the point that today work is done 24/7 by many, and done everywhere they are. It is not just that more people work at home but more people work wherever they happen to be. The technology which liberates is the technology which enslaves.
This is a highly recommended and interesting work.
2 von 2 Kunden fanden die folgende Rezension hilfreich
5.0 von 5 Sternen Important contribution to a critical topic 29. April 2011
Von Stratford Sherman - Veröffentlicht auf
Format:Gebundene Ausgabe|Verifizierter Kauf
The core challenge facing business organizations today, at least in the U.S., is that human beings have become the paramount source of enterprise value -- yet business culture hasn't had time to catch up with the realities of human nature. To be blunt, people didn't matter much in business until recent decades. The state of the art of unlocking value from people remains primitive: nobody's yet cracked the code. It's the equivalent of IT in the 19th century.

Kreamer's book takes on one important piece of the problem: the emotional nature of human beings. More specifically, the intolerance of human emotion at work. Always an issue, it has become even more critical with the dramatic increase in the female working population. (Gender issues are an important thread in this book.)

As Kreamer observes, correctly in my view, the typical workplace frustrates people. Instead of addressing human issues, business leaders too often avoid them, relying on denial, pretense, and a veneer of rationality to evade the unavoidable.

This is a good book -- brief, well-argued, and clearly intended to contribute to solutions. For people struggling with emotion at work, there's plenty of thoughtful advice. Its orientation is more to self-help and action than to theory, which probably makes it more useful.

Business culture is urgently in need of some consciousness-raising. This book will help. Pass it on.

Full disclosure: I know Anne Kreamer personally. She interviewed me for the book, and I participated in the research survey. I'm delighted to say that I think the conclusions she draws from her research are entirely sound.
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