Yes, it's true, the Queen of Norway is a sworn enemy of all giraffes, as are Gila monsters, millipedes, toucans, Lee Iacocca (and his nephews), and Matthew Perry. This educational book will teach you these facts and many more about giraffes. Did you know that giraffes are from Neptune and came to Earth on a conveyor belt? Did you know that if given the choice giraffes prefer to live in Terre Haute, Indiana? Did you know that giraffes control the world's supply of ice? You will discover these truths and much, much more in this book, written by noted giraffe scientists Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey.
This book is suitable for all ages, and even includes several useful flash cards in the back to help you study important giraffe facts. One of the most useful topics covered is the useful list of giraffe expressions, such as "I'm about to go High Renaissance on your toes," and "My pants are off, put the kettle on." There is even a chapter on the little known mortal enemies of giraffes, sea monsters from the deep, and illustrations of such epic battles as "The Clipper Ship Edward Rhys-Davis Battles the Humongous Sand Woman From Upper Volta," and "The Clipper Ship Tina Yothers Battles the Indescribably Inimitable and Big Driftwood Creature of the Bay of Bengali." These battles are illustrated with the monsters represented by plastic toys, while the Clipper Ships were fashioned out of fig-oriented treats for utmost realism.
This is a wonderfully entertaining and hilarious book, which I highly recommend to anyone with a sense of humor. If you want to know more about giraffes, I guarantee that this book will reveal things which you had never imagined.